I rather think opposites attract. You don't think so?
Not nearly as often as the cliché suggests. But more importantly, attraction merely brings two people together. A couple of days later (for teenagers) or a few weeks (for older adults)... that's when the real work starts.
The irony is, once you get into a long term relationship...the very thing you were 'attracted' to early on...might be the very thing that grates on your nerves later.
Everyone grows and changes over time. But we do have at least some control over that. Sometimes the thing that attracted us was ephemeral and turned out to not be so important. Years later in the relationship something more important could have changed in you, so that ephemeral thing in your partner might become downright annoying.
I guess there is a greater risk to protecting myself from the pain of love, and not wishing to experience that 'emotion' anymore, than there is in loving, and potentially losing. That's an interesting insight you have, there.
Thanks, but it's hardly an original revelation. 163 years ago Tennyson told us, "Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all." No, I am not a poetry maven, but I know how to use Google.
is not a risk taker, by nature.
The universe does not appear to have been designed to reward those who refuse to take risks.
Life is a gamble. If you keep folding your hand to avoid losing your bet, all you're going to do is lose your ante over and over again.
I have grown up in a verbally abusive family. If I ever started dating someone like my mother I would dump her in a heartbeat.
You'd be surprised.
People become so used to abuse that they're uncomfortable and restless when it's not there.
I think I would only be attracted to someone that is the complete opposite.
Everybody's different, that's what makes life so interesting. Nonetheless, it's quite common for both men and women to choose a partner with a lot of similarities to their mother.
I have always be attracted to intelligent women, contrary to popular belief, I must be really screwed up.
Intelligent people enjoy the company of other intelligent people. Still, a partner who does not have a high IQ may very well have a lot of other wonderful qualities, such as humor, ability to tolerate adversity, support, etc. So if you have plenty of intelligent friends to hang out with, not having an intelligent wife waiting for you at home does not have to be regrettable.
Then of course after being in these happy relationships I would always get dumped for no reason.
Please don't take this too hard, but I have to say it. It's a slogan on one of those "Demotivator" posters and there's surely some truth in it.
The only common factor in all of your failed relationships is you.
I think abusive relationships are the only types of relationships that have been shown to be scientifically successful. It is the only instance or type of situation where they say that women actually stay in relationships.
Hold on there. Simply staying together is
not the definition of a "successful" relationship! There is often quite a bit of Stockholm Syndrome in it.
Most people that I know that are in relationships are at least verbally abusive to each other, and then they stay in these relationships for long periods of time.
People become used to each other's verbal styles. Often the abusive language is just what the person learned in his parents' home, and he almost literally doesn't realize that it sounds nasty.
If a woman shows up at the office with a black eye and a limp, then we're justified in suspecting that she's in an abusive relationship. But if she spent the weekend listening to insults and profanity, she may have lived with it so long that she just laughs it off. Of course, that rhetorical style will take its toll, but it's nothing like physical abuse, so if the man treats her kindly in other ways, it's not for us to judge whether she should stay.
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me. I'm just full of aphorisms today.
The average women is often more attractive than the average man.
You don't seem to grasp the concept of "average."
. . . . why we don't all look like Greek Gods.
We do. To our dogs. What else would you call someone who brings home a dead cow every month and shares it with you?
Men and women are complicated, albeit for different reasons.
It's for the same reason: we're human.
Just be mindful to not allow a few poor experiences with the opposite sex, taint your view of the entire gender.
Or either gender. My best friend ran off with my first wife. I've managed to not hold all women responsible for the sins of one. But I've always had trust issues with men. To this day, 45 years later, most of my friends are still female.
The OP wanted to know physiological/biological reasons why a high status female would reject a man. When you speak of chemistry, it seems more focused on the psychological/sociological reasons why one person is attracted to another.
Psychology is part of biology.
I think it may take finding the Ark of the Covenant, the Holy Grail, and the Spear of Destiny. Then after combining these items it would require the sacrifice of a lamb that would enable me to read a newly formed inscription that after reciting it would then purge the world of the knowledge of good and evil. Then it might be possible if I just happen to be the first one to get to know a girl that is single and looking for a relationship.
Some day a woman will walk into your life straight out of nowhere. You'll be so smitten with her, the two of you will be so compatible, you'll understand each other so well, and you'll appreciate each other so much, that you'll forget all your past troubles with the opposite sex.
I feel if I get too patient, me and my future true love will not be able to grow old together, we will just be old together.
There are certainly plenty of people who do not find true love until they're older. But be careful: just as you're ready to release several decades of sexual frustration, you may find a woman who lost her libido ten years ago.
(That oughta get this guy off his butt!)
