i was led down the rabbit hole so to speak by one record by one of the musicians. the one that was sick and god told me to write the letter to, and then to send the flowers to. i had heard 2 songs on the radio from the record and liked them and meant to buy it. didn't get around to it. then i traveled to florida with a friend who had it in his car, and i listened to it, and liked it, and meant to buy it. didn't get around to it before i took another trip with my brother who is a guitar and bass teacher. we were chatting during a layover when he suggested i buy this record. some of his students had brought it in to learn guitar riffs from, and he said he knew i would like it. so i was like, "alright! alright! i'll get it!" (talking to god). when i did buy it and listen to it i was strangely attracted and intruiged by the lyrics and music. i could tell that the singer was in some seriously deep shit, and that it was spiritual in nature. some of what he said reminded me somehow of conversations with a good friend about her abduction experiences, but unlike her experiences, something had gone terribly wrong with him. he was tormented and angry and isolated and very sad. i wanted to help him.
for a long time i thought he was the only one. it was over a year later before other musicians who were suffering in the same way were "presented" to me. 5 others in particular, though i later discovered that there are many more, and probably other people who aren't musicians at all for all i know. i only recognize the musicians because of the messages they present in their work. it blew my mind in the first place, but then when i discovered that it was an epidemic of sorts, it was almost impossible to comprehend what was going on...
