Masturbation is for Losers

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Happeh said:
HeadTilt.jpg
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As I seem to be the only one that knows anything about science, let me demonstrate. The picture above is the subject.

Human beings are normally straight and erect. The legs may be together or widened to support the body. The arms usually hang down at the sides. The head is level and vertically straight on the neck. The eyes are normally open and balanced. The entire body is normally balanced from left to right This is the definition of a normal human being.

Science is quite easy children. We take the photo under study, then we compare it to the definition above. As this picture is of the head only, we can only examine the head.

Let's start at the bottom and work up. If we look at the neck, we can see that it is not level. It took 2 seconds to discover this man does not meet the normal definition of a human being. The man's neck is angled to the left by 30 degrees or so.

HeadTiltNeck.jpg
 
Next we move to the face. We note that not only is the neck tilted on the body, the head is tilted on the neck. The head is tilted an additional 20 degrees or so from the 30 degree unnatural tilt of the neck.

HeadTiltFace.jpg


To be thorough, where is his left ear? His right ear can be seen. His left ear is just a nub. Sure his head is tilted. Still, why doesn't more of his ear show?

HeadTilt.jpg
 
Next we examine the eyes. They eyes are angled off to the right to counteract the leftwards turn of the head and neck. The right eye is more closed than the left eye. The right eye appears to be engulfed by a large blotch that is on the right side of the face.The entire area of that blotch is damaged.

HeadTiltBlotch.jpg


There is an even darker, smaller blotch affecting the left eye here.

HeadTiltDarkerBlotch.jpg
 
Here is where it gets interesting. Look what happens if the lines of the neck are extended along there natural path.

HeadTiltNeckExtension.jpg


The natural extension of the side of the neck on the left cuts thru the eye right about where the outline of the small dark blotch was. To the left of the left line is the large dark blotch on the side of the face. The right side line also cuts off part of the face and head. The upper part of the head where the hair has receded is a damaged area of the head. The part of the hair is a diagnostic tool when examining the human body.

What you are looking at is a man who exhibits some of the symptoms predicted by Happeh Theory. The tilted neck, tilted head, dark blotch on the face, shrunken side of the left side of the head, and the different right eye than left eye are all some of the signs.

I would say this man has only small damage from excessive masturbation or sex. I would say the majority of his problem is due to drugs. I would guess he used cocaine to do what he has done to himself. The man is a politician. In the circles he travels in, cocaine use is common.

There. I took a simple picture of a person and ran a diagnostic test. Of course you will scream this does not prove why it happened. So what? The point was to show you "scientists" how to examine and diagnose what it is you are seeing. No one exhibited the ability before now so I can only guess that you did not have it.

When we get to proof of why what you see is for the reason I say, then we have to talk about trust. Just as you trust the auto mechanic when he tells you about your car symptoms, you will have to trust me when I tell you about human body symptoms.

Or we can wait 20 years while you acquire the necessary training and continue the discussion then.
 
My guess is that the guy is sitting at a table, looking up at somebody on his left. That's all.
 
James R said:
My guess is that the guy is sitting at a table, looking up at somebody on his left. That's all.
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That is fair. Your guess is wrong. He is looking off to his left. I would think a normal person would turn their eyeballs to the left. Why is the man twisting his body, neck, head and eyeballs to do something that a normal person can do with the eyeballs alone?

My expertise tells me all the things I pointed out. Why do you not agree? You are admitting you do not know much about the human body it sounds like. I am telling you I have studied this for years and I am quite good at seeing the symptoms.
 
crazyfreespirit said:
I'm confused. So you're saying that excessive sex can cause the same damage that mastrubation does?
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Yes. The women in this picture is a self admitted sex worker. As you can see in the picture, her head drops off to her right. As if her neck cannot support that side of the head.

SlutSmall.jpg


Just like the man's head drops off to the right as if his neck cannot support it.
 
I gotcha now don't I? You cannot deny the head tilt is the same on the woman and the man. The woman is a sex worker. Now all that needs to be done is interview the man and see how much he has sex, or whether he has a past history of cocaine use.

I win! ;)
 
The fact that his head is cocked off to one side says nothing as to the condition of his health to me. It looks to me like a guy performing a common facial/head expression of contemplation of something being presented to him for consideration. He's looking and it, maybe internally questioning it and perhaps on the verge of agreement or he's impressed by it. The "blotch" simply looks like a shadow.

IMO, your analysis is arbitrary because it does nothing as to consider the context under which the picture was taken - which would likely account for his expression.
 
Happeh said:
Yes. The women in this picture is a self admitted sex worker. As you can see in the picture, her head drops off to her right. As if her neck cannot support that side of the head.
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Again you fail to consider context. Obviously she's trying to look sexy in that picture. A head tilt can indicate an invitation, which is obviously what she's trying to do, given that it's an advertisement of some sort.

Your conclusion is simply ridiculous.
 
xxx-30-porn-star-portraits.jpg


This woman is also a "sex worker"...her neck seems fine to me. There are more pictures of neck-healthy sex workers, but they're...not fit for sciforums. *cough*

Ok so mastrubation and sex causes blindness and neck problems and a multitude of other things. Almost everyone has sex and/or mastrubates...why is our entire population not suffering from failing vision or lopsided-headitis?
 
You'll have to do better than that, hap.
You don't even have information about that guy. He could be a drug-free virgin, for all we know.
Also, people in advertisements don't actually work at the establishments. How many times have you seen ronald mcdonald working the fry cooker?
 
Happeh said:
I gotcha now don't I? You cannot deny the head tilt is the same on the woman and the man. The woman is a sex worker. Now all that needs to be done is interview the man and see how much he has sex, or whether he has a past history of cocaine use.
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ROTFL

Umm... Happeh, perhaps you never noticed this in your extensive studies of the human body but humans can turn their heads, bend their necks, and change their facial expressions voluntarily.

Unless you have some demonstrable reason to presume otherwise Ockham's Razor would suggest that the simplest explanation is that these pictures are simply voluntary expressions and positions.

It is also worth noting that peoples' faces (particularly men's faces) are rarely perfectly symmetrical. The dark blotches on the side of the face are shadows (as Wes pointed out) and the ones under the eyes are simply signs of aging and perhaps not enough sleep.

More to the point, even if these were symptoms you have no actual data to support your assertions, you're merely presuming to know the frequency of their sexual activities based upon the "symptoms" you assign to sex/masturbation. Your argument is circular.

~Raithere
 
Happeh said:
My expertise tells me all the things I pointed out. Why do you not agree? You are admitting you do not know much about the human body it sounds like. I am telling you I have studied this for years and I am quite good at seeing the symptoms.
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i sympathize with you. i presented a paper that proposed that metricular callusification of the palms were indicative of excessive masturbation. it was rejected by the peer review process.

it was then i realized i was far more advanced than my fellow humans. in fact, you, happeh, are above the rest. i will grant you that. yet, definitely nowhere near a being of my intellect and skills.
 
what truly amazes me is that science has yet to face up to the fact that hairy palms and blindness are caused by masturbation. the evidence is overwhelming and undoubtable to any thinking human being. it is unfortunate we have so few of those. (thinking that is)
 
wesmorris said:
The fact that his head is cocked off to one side says nothing as to the condition of his health to me. It looks to me like a guy performing a common facial/head expression of contemplation of something being presented to him for consideration. He's looking and it, maybe internally questioning it and perhaps on the verge of agreement or he's impressed by it. The "blotch" simply looks like a shadow.

IMO, your analysis is arbitrary because it does nothing as to consider the context under which the picture was taken - which would likely account for his expression.
Click to expand...

The context is irrelevant to the man's underlying physical condition. The pose he holds reveals the underlying condition in a more obvious way is the only relevance it might hold.
 
wesmorris said:
Again you fail to consider context. Obviously she's trying to look sexy in that picture. A head tilt can indicate an invitation, which is obviously what she's trying to do, given that it's an advertisement of some sort.

Your conclusion is simply ridiculous.
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No it is not ridiculous if you have a proper view of the human body.

Think like a scientist. Just don't claim to be one.

Why does tiliting the head indicate an invitation from the female of the human species to the male of the human species?

A dog in heat runs in front of the other dogs to give them a smell so they will come hither. That is for dogs. We know it is the smell that brings in the male dog.

Why does a male human being come to a female human being when they tilt their head?

That is in depth science observation.
 
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