Is it just me, or is it really HOT in here?
Child/Adult Sexual Contact and Evidence
- Thread starter issuishman
- Start date
Let's face it. Society has put an arbitrary limit on a powerful innate human behavior that is not inherently harmful, like murder. There are therefore bound to be serious problems associated with it. One of them is the criminalization of a man for having a consensual relationship with a willing young woman. I for one believe that the sexual interaction between people of childbearing age is between them and those concerned with their wellbeing. There is nothing "natural" about our current view of this. Nature is well aware of the appropriate behaviors in this arena.
The problem here is the same problem with any innate human behaviors. Somehow we got the idea that certain things were "good" and others "bad" without any clue as to the underlying human motivations. Solutions to these types of issues require a deeper understanding of human nature and how to best accommodate it for the benefit of everyone.
The problem here is the same problem with any innate human behaviors. Somehow we got the idea that certain things were "good" and others "bad" without any clue as to the underlying human motivations. Solutions to these types of issues require a deeper understanding of human nature and how to best accommodate it for the benefit of everyone.
not changing sides here, because i do believe that sex with children is wrong, wrong, wrong, WRONG ...but i can see where the line gets a little fuzzy with older children. my husband has been on floats (marine corps) and had liberty in different countries. he's seen 13-year-old girls that look like they're 25. and the age of adulthood there is much lower than here.
i still want to know - because nothing will be resolved until this is specified - what is the age of the theoretical "children" we're discussing?
i still remember being 15 and being as randy as a goat (yeah, great visual right?). so, yeah, sexual urges do hit at what the US society (for all y'all that are gracing us with your presence elsewhere in the world) considers too early an age to be acting upon. i'm going to assume that boys develop even faster than girls in that department.
and - still clinging to my twenties - i don't consider 14 and 15 to be children really. teens, young, yes. but not children. children are the no no. teens are a slightly different story.
i still want to know - because nothing will be resolved until this is specified - what is the age of the theoretical "children" we're discussing?
i still remember being 15 and being as randy as a goat (yeah, great visual right?). so, yeah, sexual urges do hit at what the US society (for all y'all that are gracing us with your presence elsewhere in the world) considers too early an age to be acting upon. i'm going to assume that boys develop even faster than girls in that department.
and - still clinging to my twenties - i don't consider 14 and 15 to be children really. teens, young, yes. but not children. children are the no no. teens are a slightly different story.
MetaKron said:
i'm 26 and i still get carded for cigarettes. i had one clerk argue with me and threaten to take my license on one particularly memorable trip to get alcohol.
i can't blame a man that is attracted to a physically mature female no matter what her age. but if the girl is obviously not an "adult" then there's a problem.
The perspective changes with age.
Until you are old enough to be their parent 14 or 15 doesn't look too young.
When you are old enough to be their grand parent they look like babies.
--- Ron.
Until you are old enough to be their parent 14 or 15 doesn't look too young.
When you are old enough to be their grand parent they look like babies.
--- Ron.
You got that right. I remember being in my 20's and thinking I was a mature adult. Now I see "kids" on the street, and my wife reminds me that they're in their 20's. Crap.perplexity said:
Well, I find that really hard to answer. Ok. Not really. Realistically, I'd have to wonder at the mental state of the woman or man, and I'd be completely opposed to it.samcdkey said:
If we seperate the sexual from the emotional, it's relatively easy to argue for the capability of a 14 yr old to have sex. Happens all the time. But the emotional/relationship part is always much more complex. Are these adults looking for anything other than sex? Probably not. What is the 14yr old interested in? Just sex? A relationship? What emotional hurt will they suffer?
I fully admit to being a product of my times. The word "perverted" pretty much sums it up. Not because of the sexual aspect, but the mismatch between the motivations and goals of a 14yr old and a 30yr old is (usually) so great that a "relationship" other than just for sex, is out of the question.
samcdkey said:
I'd be wondering what is wrong with his mother
samcdkey said:
And wondering what is wrong with her father.
People form relationships to fill gaps in their lives, and the bigger the gap the greater the need.
--- Ron.
samcdkey said:
and here we have the obvious double-standard concerning boys and girls. a girl of that age with an older man is utter taboo in most cases. but there is a little more leeway involving the boy and an older woman. not much but a little.
in most cases, the parents would be livid it if it was their daughter and merely disapproving if it was their son.
Oy veh! I refuse to answer on grounds that it may make me look like a raving hyppocrite.samcdkey said:
"Objective? How can I be objective? These are my kids we're talking about...!"
Unattributed source.
Aye, lass. I think we understand each other.
Next subject?
Next subject?
First, you use the words "abuse" and "molested" which clearly presupposes that it is indeed a violent act. As for an opinion of the actual effect? I don't have one. The popular wisdom is that it is a horrible, life-scarring event. This is such a taboo and unapproachable subject though, how would you propose to do quality, controlled studies on this?samcdkey said:
Can we construct a study where 7/8/9yr olds are placed in a loving, quiet environment, with parents in attendance, in which the child is encouraged to explore themselves, with the help of an older "friend"? And then follow them to adulthood and see how they turn out? No. All we have are the outcomes of uncontrolled, mostly involuntary (rape) violent experiences of young people.
We know that children discover their sexuality at a very early age. They are sometimes very open about it, until an adult notices little Billy or Sally rubbing themselves, and then the reactions range from shocked to concerned to embarrassment. Until then, the children seem pretty ok with it. They don't seem to traumatize themselves much. I know I didn't.
Bottom line: I don't think we, as a society, have a clue how to handle the sexuality of children except to hide from it and propagate the sexual taboos inflicted on us from childhood into adulthood.
superluminal said:
What about evidence from primitive societies? I seem to remember Margaret Mead did some work among the Samoans where she found that the children transitioned easily from childhood to adolescence ( considered adulthood) due to lack of sexual taboos...