why do women do this?

what do you all think...

  • You blew it. She aint gonna pick up your next call.

    Votes: 6 21.4%

  • You probably did something wrong while getting it on...

    Votes: 7 25.0%

  • She cared about you and didn't wanna appear trashy.

    Votes: 10 35.7%

  • Maybe she was on her period and did not wanna say it.

    Votes: 9 32.1%

  • She was testing you, you should have said good night after kissing her.

    Votes: 5 17.9%

  • It was a first date, take it slow next time.

    Votes: 22 78.6%
  • Total voters
    28
chris4355 said:
Well its real good you find someone to care about. Most people never have this for a lifetime. Hopefully it'll happen to most of us.

As for me, well, for now I just enjoy being single. I can't ever really settle, I find too many people too interesting.

I really like women, I have been in love etc... but even then there never has been a time where I wanted to be with that person forever.

I guess I'm just a... "jerk". :eek:
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No, no, no. You are not a "jerk". You just haven't found that one person who really grabs your heart and yanks it out of your chest (Painful yet so blissfully good ;)). Maybe you never will and that's not always a bad thing. Some people find happiness in just being with a variety of others who make them happy and don't find the need to settle with just one person. Monogamy is not for everyone and that doesn't make you a "bad" person. My BF and I have been together for 7 years (since we were 17), but we have yet to be married even though all our friends have either done the marriage thing, moved into together, or popped out a few kids. We just know that what we have is what we want and we take it day by day. Our lives demand it be that way and we make it work.

Truth be told, love isn't easy. We've had our ups and downs, our knock-down drag-out fights, our rocky roads, but in the end he's the other half of my heart and soul and that's all that matters. It's not all fucking flowers and pink hearts. In fact, it's the fight that makes it worth it. We fight to love each other through thick and thin, through good and bad, through hell and fire and brimstone etc. But we don't need a ring or a marriage certificate or a stupid fancy wedding to know all that.

The point is...be who you are. Enjoy being who you are. If you like being single, stay that way. If you find that one person who is able to hold your heart in their hands and you wish it to be that way...GO for it. Don't worry about silly games, or stereotypes, or "rules" placed on us by society.

Do what makes you happy. And hey, you never know, maybe the girl who gave you blue balls is the one who you will end up willing to die for, lol ;)

You just never know.
 
lol. ive had my fair share of troubled relationships.... not for seven years though :rolleyes:

I do think not marrying too early is the healthy way to go, I kinda tend to notice that many people my age, even guys feel like tying the knot is the only means of a secure relationship. its good you too are keeping it open, giving it more time.

As for me, well, I guess I'll never know. For now I always have an open mind with a slight touch of apathy towards any girl I date, just because I've noticed that dwelling and worrying over someone usually backfires.
 
Gah..... lots of things wrong with the OP's story - first is the "quid-pro-quo" aspect of the description. There's also the fact that this is treated as something "all women do" as opposed to a situation in an individual date with an individual person. This post makes the assumption that men always make the first move, men never take it slow, and women are never fast. It also gives me the impression that a certain set of actions are supposed to trigger a certain reaction in a woman, and if they don't comply, the male is unjustly stymied.
I don't think there is a bigger picture here that needs analysis.
 
phlogistician said:
When you were 15 years old? Please, that wasn't an adult relationship, and while you may have felt teenage angst etc, it hardly counts.
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Fair enough. I am not going to argue that going through a divorce or breaking up with someone after dating them for 5+ years is something I have experienced.

But I've been around, and gotten hurt, and understood the general norm on how relationships work.
 
domesticated om said:
It also gives me the impression that a certain set of actions are supposed to trigger a certain reaction in a woman, and if they don't comply, the male is unjustly stymied.
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You should have that impression. There are countless guys out there who think like that. Meaning that if he puts for the effort into taking her out, etc. and she doesn't respond the way he wants (i.e. putting out), he give her the brush off. But I think women are way more versed in brushing people off than the other way around.
 
Women get more actual practice (necessarily) than guys at brushing off.
In general.
 
phlogistician said:
You are 22 and you think you have 'been around'. PRICELESS!
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So just based off my age you judge my entire judgement of women and relationships in general. How very wise of you, care to elaborate?

Its not because you might have gone through more life experiences that you might suddenly feel like you are more correct than me.

Someone can go through a life of shitty relationships and another can go through a life of constant appraisal and love. Very different lives, both have "been around", very different perspectives and results.

Its all relative.
 
chris4355 said:
I didn't ask you this question personally, just in general. Since you say men cannot properly romance women anymore, I want to know, how do you think women should be romanced?
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Depends on the man, its a statement of who the man is. Not what the woman wants. The way a man treats a woman is the only criteria that a woman has for gauging a man's feelings. Its his presentation, so to speak.
 
S.A.M. said:
Depends on the man, its a statement of who the man is. Not what the woman wants. The way a man treats a woman is the only criteria that a woman has for gauging a man's feelings. Its his presentation, so to speak.
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I guess I kinda get what you mean, its just a little vague.

Are you essentially saying treat the woman with respect and present yourself well?
 
I'm saying maybe she wanted to see what you would do and how you'd react to her wishes.
 
darksidZz said:
This thread is hard for me to understand as the OP is further along than I ever will be =P
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You're not ugly, you're smart and you have a great voice [at least, I like it]

Whats holding you back? Why do you always go after women who are already tied to someone else? Do you think you deliberately sabotage your chances for any reason?
 
mikenostic said:
You should have that impression. There are countless guys out there who think like that. Meaning that if he puts for the effort into taking her out, etc. and she doesn't respond the way he wants (i.e. putting out), he give her the brush off. But I think women are way more versed in brushing people off than the other way around.
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So a date is a contract? Bologna. I'd turn down people left and right if that was the case.......and I'd eventually get really good at it.

Either that, or I'd get my own lawyer.....
 
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