Jokes and Funny Stories II

James R said:
This latest string of "jokes" is in pretty poor taste all around.
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James R
is it?

if an Irish man tells Irish jokes, is it funny or offensive? same if the race is Black, Hindu, Native American, or any other cultural, political or sexual derivation... is it offensive or just an attempt to make fun of stupidity?

the more successful comics talk about things that really aren't funny, but yet people laugh
why?
is it because people laughing like offending others or it it due to the realisation of the absurdity of stereotyping, racism, sexism (etc, ad nauseum)?

the point being: humour is subjective, but is also a great tool for exposing reality and teaching
often times the absurdity of reality can't be exposed until the humorists decide to liberate the public and demonstrate the stupidity of the characterizations or depictions with this type material.

or... to put it far shorter and more succinctly :

sideshowbob said:
Shakespeare is dead so we have to make do.
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EDIT and post script
my family is truly multicultural and multiracial (and we have disabled folk too...)
if the above offends you, you would really hate our family gatherings. heck, we've had the cops called on us more than once because people didn't comprehend the commotion...

meh

post post script - Dr_Toad
remove the dishes?
I knew we were doing something wrong
 
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ethnic joke:
Fellow gets hired onto a road stripe painting crew.
Boss takes him out to the job side, pulls a bucket of paint and brush out of the ih travelall and says "Here's your bucket and here's your brush, just paint over the existing stripes"
Friday comes and guys are lined up to get their pay.
Fellow's turn comes and he approaches the desk. Boss says:
"On monday, you painted 10 miles. No one has ever painted 10 miles----wow. I was impressed.
On Tuesday you painted about 6 miles----still above average.
On Wednesday, you only painted about 4 miles---average.
On Thursday, you only painted a little over 2 miles----not really acceptable, but the average still looked good.
Today, you painted less than a mile, and this is unacceptable.
So, tell me Sven, what went wrong?"
Sven answered: "Vell, I youst kept getting furder and furder avay frum da bucket."
 
James R said:
This latest string of "jokes" is in pretty poor taste all around. Are you guys proud of yourselves, attaching your names to these on a public forum?
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DaveC426913 said:
It is funny to some, offensive to others.
Either way, it's still racially-based.

I don't really have so much problem with that,
certainly not in comparison to...
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Every irish joke I have told on this forum, are told to me by a real good friend; an Irish friend.
If they offend anyone I apologise......but really, sheesh!

ps: I worked for QANTAS for 14 years.
When all this politically correct stuff was first being instilled, our management told us that from a certain day, manholes were not to be called manholes anymore, but person holes! It was deemed as sexist! :rolleyes:
With a little arm bending and persuasion from our Union, it was withdrawn in short time.
Just an example of political correction gone mad imho.
 
DaveC426913 said:
It is funny to some, offensive to others.
Either way, it's still racially-based.

I don't really have so much problem with that,
certainly not in comparison to...
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every joke i've ever posted that could be described as racist or ethnic was told to me by a person of said race or ethnic label
mostly because they're in the family

here's an adapted one - i changed the race from "Magyar" to "Oglala"

a woman hires a contractor to work on her lawn and paint her house, inside and out
she is telling the man what she wants as she goes through the house
"I want the living room eggshell white" she says.
the contractor walks to the window, opens it and yells out "GREEN UP! GREEN UP!"
she is confused, but continues "the kitchen, i want a light tan with chocolate brown trim"
the contractor walks to the window, opens it and again yells out "GREEN UP! GREEN UP!"
she gets frustrated and decides she wants to test the contractor. "I want the bedroom a bright yellow with orange, brown, pink and green paisley flowers"
the contractor walks to the window, opens it and again yells out "GREEN UP! GREEN UP!"
she is getting mad now, and says "make the master bathroom all tie-died with ultraviolet highlights and ceiling"
the contractor walks to the window, opens it and again yells out "GREEN UP! GREEN UP!"
this repeats for all her bedrooms, bathrooms, den, basement and family room... and finally she can take it no more!
"I've given you all kinds of colours for all my different rooms" she cries, "and all you can yell is "GREEN UP"??? i don't understand!"

the contractor sighs... "Sorry for the confusion, maam. i have two Oglala putting in the lawn, you see..."

.

.

and in the spirit of the recent farce on TV:
i am both Magyar and Oglala and i approve this joke
 
Truck Captain Stumpy said:
here's an adapted one - i changed the race from "Magyar" to "Oglala"
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A tribal policeman is patrolling along the edge of the reservation when he sees a school bus upside down at the bottom of a ravine. He scrambles down to investigate and then radios in, "There's a school bus full of white kids crashed at such-and-such-a-place. They're all dead."

The dispatcher replies, "Are you sure?" Maybe I should send an ambulance."

The patrolman answers, "Well, some of them claim they're still alive but you know you can't believe anything white people say."​

When I first heard it, it was a fat southern sheriff and a busload of black kids. But my version seems more true-to-life.
 
sideshowbob said:
But my version seems more true-to-life.
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and the first time i heard it it was a white state trooper and a busload of Oglala kids...

EDIT: correction - Lakota kids (but Oglala are Lakota, so... meh)

if we can't laugh at ourselves... others surely will
and then make up sh*t about why we're too stupid to get it
right?

LOL
 
I don't wish to derail a joke thread with serious discussion (how many posts warrant a split?), but ... well, ya sortta gotta fight it where you see it.

Truck Captain Stumpy said:
if we can't laugh at ourselves... others surely will
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Who is this "we"? Do you speak for all white/x-colour/Lakota people?

That's the problem with any kind of racism. It doesn't matter what colour your skin is, you are still denigrating a people. And, promoting the acceptance of racist humour in the process.


(I'm not trying to shut this down - I simply feel it's important that we all call a spade a spade, and no one pretends it's a fluffy bunny.)
 
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DaveC426913 said:
(I'm not trying to shut this down - I simply feel it's important that we all call a spade a spade, and no one pretends it's a fluffy bunny.)
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Aussies in general, have a culture at laughing at themselves, as obviously Irish people do to.
As I said, If I did offend anyone, either Irish or Aussie, or if anyone thought I was denigrating women, or condoning any sort of violence towards them, I am sorry, but I certainly meant no harm or inference.
Perhaps cultural standards of the particular age one was raised in, is hard to eliminate: case in point.....I was in a bus yesterday, which was getting pretty crowded as the trip proceeded and people were standing up. A 45ish, 50ish woman got on the bus standing in the aisle next to where I was seated.
Having gone to a Catholic school, we were taught what was called "Christian Politeness" and one of those points was in such a scenario, to stand and offer the woman a seat: This I did, to the look of amazement on her face, and telling me she was not disabled! :)
After some friendly haggling I talked her into being seated, and told her not to worry, as I was a tough old bastard. ;)
 
Dave: Just to give you an idea of what I mean, we have a comedian in Sydney that does the club rounds: Alex would I suggest know him, as would James.
He is know as "Steady Eddy": He has "severe Cerebral Palsy......
Here he is in action.......


it is only 6.5 minutes long, watch him.
 
DaveC426913 said:
That's the problem with any kind of racism
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How would you handle this one Dave.
An aboriginal I know, he is the nephew of a good friend. Aunty introduced him as "Blackie" and I got to know him pretty well so one day I could not help myself and asked him what did he think of his name. He said he had it as long as he could remember.
I said but doesn't it reflect racial prejudice. He said that he really did not care and would rather that than his real name which he did not like.
And he told me the most terrible aboriginal joke I ever heard but it really was a backhander to racial prejudice folk.
I can't remember it , I will try.
I think like Paddoboy we come from a different era.
I think the problem is more about class hatred. That's what I see that I'd say the most disturbing.
It is not talked about but it is there even in a country like ours where folk would say there is no class.. But there is.
Educated folk look down upon uneducated folk. Rich folk look down upon poor folk.

You are more likely to be defined by this non existent class than race, in my experience.

And it is hateful and drips of disrespect.

Folk think if they have a better education and earn more money they are above others.
I saw it first hand as a real estate agent.
Tenants are regarded as second class citizens. In my office they were treated with respect. And guess what I stood out because no other office approached them that way.

Class hatred terms here... Bogan, Westie, Northshoreite, Hippies, Ferals, Druggie, Silver-tail, Country bumkin, Primary school drop out, dole bludger, and they are only a few.
Alex
 
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Two "dole bludgers" were walking across the Tabulam wooden bridge when a "cow cocky" driving a land rover speeding across hit both of them at 80 klms over the speed limit.

He reported to the police station and told how one had come through the wind screen and landed on the back seat unconscious and the other had been hurled off the bridge into the river below.
"No problems sir" said the policeman " I will charge the one on the back seat with breaking and entering and the one in the river with leaving the scene of an accident."
Blackie told me this joke I changed things just a little.
Alex
 
My best mate was a NZ aboriginal he died and another mate said when I was mourning " yes but he was black" I wanted to kill him.

And this mongrel dog scum bag played in the same band, drank with him etc and yet held this horrible race thing...I can't get my head around it.

But I stayed calm and just never had anything to do with this guy again...
Alex
 
DaveC426913 said:
As I said, the trick is to pick the time and place - and by that, I mean the audience.

If this age of viral shaming and the destruction of lives has taught us nothing else, it's that some things are too delicate to be shared with an unknown audience.
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point taken
 
Xelasnave.1947 said:
" yes but he was black"
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There's a subtle "one of us" attitude that runs very deep in humans. If there's a plane crash anywhere in the world, our national news will report, "... three hundred dead. It is not known whether any of them were Canadians." Because THAT would be serious. Presumably, even non-white Canadians are more important than those bloody foreigners.
 
sideshowbob said:
... three hundred dead. It is not known whether any of them were Canadians.Because THAT would be serious. Presumably, even non-white Canadians are more important than those bloody foreigners."
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I think that is an overly-cynical stance.

Here is a far less cynical reason:

It's not "I'm a-feared that a Canadian is dead, not so much about the non-Canadians.";
it's "I'm a-feared that someone I know is dead, not so much about the complete strangers."

I am suddenly alert because now I have to rule out friends, family and associates or friends-of-friends. Otherwise, some sadness (or at least condolences) are in my personal future.
 
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sideshowbob said:
There's a subtle "one of us" attitude that runs very deep in humans. If there's a plane crash anywhere in the world, our national news will report, "... three hundred dead. It is not known whether any of them were Canadians." Because THAT would be serious. Presumably, even non-white Canadians are more important than those bloody foreigners.
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Well my NZ mate I thought was one of us, we were in a band, and yet this bigot who I no longer call a mate did not see my NZ mate as really "us".
I know what you are saying but I will never get over that episode.
My NZ mate was such a good friend I miss him and to have another write him off only adds to the hurt of his passing.
Alex
 
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