TheVisitor, Seriously, honestly, I have no desire of any sort to see God.
Long since I had already concluded that to be so shy to reveal herself the very vision of God would be unimaginably repulsive, ugly beyond belief, so while it may be possible to survive the shock of that, in terms of privacy, with all due respect, I would rather not inflict the embarrassment, not at least until I manage to achieve a commensurate sense of the same, somewhere nearer to decrepit necropsy. .
Good point....again I am astounded.
At first this reminded me of a story of some ancient Babylonian demigod, whom it's said men with but a glimpse of it's visage were driven insane.
But then.... I remembered Isaiah's account Saying; "Woe is me! for I am undone;.......... because I am a man of unclean lips, and I dwell in the midst of people of unclean lips: for my eyes have seen the King, the LORD of hosts."
Maybe it's our own ugliness we are afraid to see, or that which in this day of freedom we have allowed to exist in us even worse.
That is more like a real reaction to the meeting of God, in my book also.
Petrifying fear...........I would be there with you, wanting to just get away unless I knew my sins were all under the blood.
I know perfect Love casteth out all fear and thats what I'm striving for...
Even so....the guilt of my being the reason for the shedding of that Holy Blood would be too much to bear....
Yet somehow I still am driven, I have to overcome every besetting obstacle till I am basking in That Presense.......
If you have ever been there, you would miss it.
I am agreed though on this business of testing, intrigued by the paradox of religion as the opium of the people contrasted with Jesus the warrior, the shameless lover of enemies and the suffering thus to be inflicted. What a merry tale, so much more of a brave sport as compared to being spoon fed by science, but what a perilously painful example to emulate!.
I have no greater Hero.....
I count it an honor to endure some small measure of suffering, to be counted worthy of such glory...
So easily said I know....it's all the right words but....I would not want to go on and be there with nought but my own contempt and shame at a life wasted in selfish squander.
There is such sadness and despair in this world....I have already known and may yet be more ahead but all of it is not worthy to be compared to such Glory that even now is being revealed in me.
Each day I feel the light of a whole universe inside me bursting to be expressed.
Words can't speak the tale....and do it justice.
For as far back as I recall there was this sense, I would call it a resentment, of being the rat in the maze, observed as if to test if I was yet to find the way out, so if you you happen to meet with the said observer upstairs, please inform that I was not best pleased with that uncomfortable combination of a Worldly Father I might rather have done without, while the Heavenly Father was for reasons best known to herself, content to leave me to it like some sort of stray dog in a temporary kennel.
I am sorry your father was not there as he should have been, and it appeared your Heavenly Father abandoned you as well....but everything is not always what it seems.
There is that hidden law of opposites thats always at work in the spiritual.
Tragedy, brings us closer to realizing our need, not focusing our lives on wants.
We do not sit as a queen having need of nothing.
Although sometimes we know it not.
He is concerned with the upbringing of His children.
You have no doubt endured a harsh life it sounds and sometimes it appears God has forsaken us, but your words betray an understanding perhaps gained through that suffering others that seem so blessed in the worlds goods will never know.
Some seem never to see sorrow born blessed with big families and traditions , but neither will they see the strings entangling them in the cares of this world.
They are tied up, like birds in a gilded cage while the churches of this world take their money to ease their conscience, bless their babies, bury their dead and lead the blind right on their way down that broad...well trodden....path.
Solomon said; "There is no better thing for the sons of man to do than to enjoy the fruits of their labor and the works of their hands...all the days of their life."
God has not forsaken even the children of His enemies a life of good things on the Earth.
Solomon was not talking about the sons of God.
For them is saved a greater portion...
The scriptures say; "Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live?
For they verily for a few days chastened us after their own pleasure; but He for our profit, that we might be partakers of His holiness."
Why then to be so forsaken while they know not what they do?
If God herself gets to be tested every now and then it serves her right, and I am not even sure if either of us passed or not.
Forgive them Father.....
I don't know why it had to be this way. I'm sorry.....I wish......
I just know we have to be tested and there will be some that fall on both sides.
It's His will to cause this seperation....
The scriptures say "try ye first the spirits,to see if they be of God"
So we have to know the Word and have our senses exercised.....in the discernment of good and evil.
We by revelation possess the light that can rightly divide the day from the night.
"For whom the Lord loveth, He chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom He receiveth.
If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is he whom the Father chasteneth not?
But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons.
Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby"