what's the reason why you are atheist by the way???? i mean, why did you become an atheist???
I became an atheist gradually, it wasn't a quick-tempered or ill-thought-out move, nor was it due to any kind of limerance concerning the idea of it. There was a time where I, like you, looked upon atheists as nothing but an immoral, selfish, unthoughtful, and ignorant lot. But of course I thought this, how else was I supposed to think under such a potent influence of Christian opinons? As I grew and absorbed more and more of the world around me, I came to the then shocking realization that these people calling themselves atheists were just that, people; people with morals, goals, love, joy, and everything that I had been taught were in total possession of those who knew Christ, and those who knew him only.
This, in a nutshell, is the same token that allowed me to examine my beliefs; these people were wrong about atheists, certainly they could be wrong when they tell me other things. I gradually discovered (at the time, to my great and tortuous dismay) that atheists weren't the only thing that my "family" seemed to have an askewed view of. The more I thought about it and the more I learned (about things pertaining to my faith and things that were seemingly irrelevent to it), the more contradictory, outlandish, and unlikely the whole idea of a God became.
It was these notions accompanied with months worth of countless hours of deep study that it became very clear; Christianity was not logically sound in the slightest. It was a complete magic trick, performed by people who don't know any more about what they are talking about than I did. This led me to seperate from mainstream religion, being ever closer to the edge of the spectrum of faith (at this point, I wasn't agreeing with most everything I heard from the pulpit, but I still considered myself a Christian) until eventually I become agnostic; I surely didn't think there was a God, but realized that I had no grounds to throw him out as a possibility. I couldn't prove him but I couldn't disprove him either. So there I stayed.
That is until I came across Richard Dawkins, specifically The God Delusion. Never in my life have I read such an intellectually satisfying book; it articulates so many notions I had but wasn't educated or well-spoken enough to present to anyone, including myself. I find now that the joy and uplifting admiration I derive from this world view is remarkably similar to the revelatory appreciaton I had when God first became a real idea to me ("this is his creation! It's so great and mysterious!"). The difference is that now, I have an understanding of why things are the way they are, how they came to be, and how they continue to be; not just a "magic man" philosophy that just "felt so real to me". It is, as Douglas Adams so eloquently said, "I'd take the awe of understanding over the awe of ignorance any day."
That may have been a longer dissertation than you barganed for! But oh well, it felt good to document all that.