I just read the rest of you post and just have to reply to your points:
I've heard all the arguments. In fact I've made them all myself. Hell is not really a fiery furnace, it's just a metaphor for spiritual separation from God. God doesn't send us there, we effectively choose to go. Blah blah blah et cetera et cetera. I've even tried to argue around the apparent finality of eternal damnation with sneaky semantical tricks and novel scriptural interpretations. But in the end it's all pretty clear. If you're not right with God when the end comes, you're screwed. Forever.
I detect a deep disagreement with the reality of the eternal nature of the Lake of Fire. It seems in the past you tried your best to teach a denial of the reality of it and sought to sideline it as a metaphor. But in the end disagreement leads to rebellion which leads to disbelief. You seem to have gone down the path of many former christians.
And being right with God means more than just paying him lip service and trying to be a decent person. Being right with God means significant personal sacrifices and lifestyle changes. You basically have to repent of all your sins, become a disciple of Jesus Christ and actively try to bring as many other people to God as you possibly can for the rest of your life. That is what the Bible demands.
A Works based belief in winning ones own salvation is a denial of the effective Atonement of the Messiah Jesus. You belief in this matter no matter how genuinely held is false and will eventually lead to the person being spewed out of belief.
Lack of performance in being like Jesus should cause Christians regret and shame. But belief that failure to live up to the wonderful/perfect example of Jesus is cause for ones eternal condemnation is a slipperyside to oblivion as you reveal in your personal testimony of your falling away from Jesus.
Ok, fine. Let's assume that God is real, the Bible is his message to us, and that we need to put it all into practice.
Once agian you assume wrong. We need to Believe it. Our efforts in putting it into practice has no bearing on our eternal destination.
So off I go and do just that. Not just for the sake of it but because I've found God and I've genuinely embraced it all. Jackpot. Eternal salvation. It's not a lottery of course, but it is a reward. The Bible characterizes it as such. Life couldn't be better (life on Earth, that is). But eventually something occurs to me and slowly starts eating away at my newfound joy. I love my Mum. I love my little brothers and sisters. I love my Grandmother. But even worse than that (and you might get why it's worse in just a second), I love my dead Grandfather. My Dad wasn't in the picture when I was growing up so he was the closest thing I had to a father. And he died a couple of years ago. I imagine that you can already see where I'm going with this.
My Grandfather was the most generous man I have ever known. He had his faults that's for sure, but there's nothing he wouldn't have done for me, his family or his friends. I have very fond memories of him. We sprinkled his ashes into the ocean near where he grew up after he died. But as much as I loved him, he was apparently afflicted with the greatest flaw of all. He was agnostic, and certainly not a disciple of Jesus Christ. According to the Bible, he's going to burn in hell forever. And if I (or someone else) can't manage to bring them to God before they die, my mother, my grandmother, my two little brothers and sisters and all my friends are destined to meet the same fate. Suddenly I'm not feeling so fucking happy about going to heaven one day. What do you think I'm going to be thinking about the whole time I'm there?
So you love your grandfather and other family members more that you love Jesus? what did Jesus say about that?
Matthew 10
37 He who loves father or mother more than Me is not worthy of Me. And he who loves son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me.
Each individual is responsible for their own acceptance or rejection of the Message of the Messiah Jesus. If your grandfather did receive the true message of the Messiah Jesus and rejected it (i don't know if he did) then he will have eternity in the lake of fire for doing so.
I'm sorry for making this post so personal. But it's necessary to explore the reality of what we're talking about. It is personal.
Yes it is personal. But it is good that you gave your thoughts clearly, it gives and opportunity for them to be measured against the Word of God and your misconceptions can be revealed and explored.
And when you look at it, the way it really is, ultimately there is no fucking mercy, not for all of us anyway.
Not for anyone who rejects the atonement of the Messiah Jesus. But for me there is mercy.
So to answer the question posed by the OP, "What is God's Mercy?", when all is said and done I can't see how you could argue that he has any.
Of course He has mercy, But your disagreement with his will has caused you to be lead down a path where you have falsely come to this conclusion that He has no mercy.
All Praise The Ancient of Days