Sociopathy, like every other psych condition, runs along a spectrum...one assumes there would be mild to severe impairment in empathy, no?
There are lots of people who are capable of being lovely to their family and completely ethics-free when it comes to the larger society...capable of being utterly ruthless in service of their wife/husband and kids.
And people who let their inner demons out to play on their kids. Or their spouse.
(I don't think my father qualified as a sociopath so much as he was someone re-enacting his own trauma. He felt guilt, but he destroyed the people around him anyway. And it doesn't excuse him.)
I do have a concience, but I can just flip a switch and turn it off.
That's not terribly uncommon, really.
If it wasn't for your other psych issues you would have done wonderfully at clandestine contract work.
I remember a book title that came out, and I wanted to get y hands on and haven't yet...this topic reminded me of it...and I stuck it on my Amazon wishlist now, so I'll remember to get it @ some point...
"The Sociopath Next Door" by Martha Stout.
My first boyfriend was a sociopath-felt no contradiction between telling me he loved me and using me shamelessly for cash. When I wised up he moved on to another woman. Most sociopaths just use their way through life, depending on the kindness of dupes...these are the ones that don't end up in jail, don't get violent, have good impulse control, and really enjoy a good skillful rooking of the people around them.
They have the moral universe of a 2-year old, really; it's "How do I get what I want and not get caught?" And like a 2-Year old the more impulsive get violent when their desires are frustrated.
But unlike a 2-year old, they have an enormously inflated self-opinion, and a view of everyone else as stupid sheeple...
The violent ones have less impulse control, and the serial killers are the rare ones who somehow get precipitated towards killing for amusement-often sexual amusement.
My own...dataless hunch... is that the first category is more prevalent, the non-impulsive calculating manipulators. And no, these aren't going to show up in research, because, well, they don't usually wind up in jail, they lie, and as with most personality disorders-the personality-disordered person doesn't think they have a problem. They think everyone else has the problem, so they won't go into a therapist asking to be fixed, right?