"No Masturbation or Porn for you!?"

[John99]

I thought i was posting in the CD thread.

What RESEARCH by scientists are you even referring to?

there is a documentry by the people dan brown used as sources for the De Vinc code. Its quite facinating, these are not fiction writers but rather anthropologists and archiologists. Not sure if i belive everything they theorise but some of it is just to compelling to not be taken seriously. It also matches with some of the other stuff i have watched or read like a show on the ABC called umm real achology? i think, anyway its hosted by the guy who plays baldric it went through some pagen fertility rights and other things perferial to this subject which back up the pre catholic church religions. Then there was another documentry on the nostic gospal of jeudus and tomos which again adds to the puzzle.

Perhaps that has something to do with this:

As i said you used to go into church and have sex with the priestess to reach god (women didnt need to do this because it was belived they had the divine in them, ie the ability to create new life). How does a MALE based church get power when all the power is in the hands of the females? they take away there power by making sex something dirty.

People have sex, it is not that big of a deal. Even rats have sex, you want to make a religion based on it?

Edit: Well it should be something special but...i really dont know why you think it should be worshipped.

As i said you used to go into church and have sex with the priestess to reach god (

That is just dumb. The priestess was a hooker?

 

[Asguard]

i think you missed a vital point (though you managed to quote it) dan brown took LEGITIMATE scientific work and used it as the back drop for his FICTION book. This doesnt mean the background work was fiction at all, quite the contrary. However that being said i havent posted any of this for your benift because i already know what your like. You chose to follow the "teachings (dictates) of the church" ie its way to maintain power and nothing i can say will change that. If i had a time machine and took you back to the relivent events you STILL wouldnt belive that the church is full of it. The only reason i posted any of that is because not everyone is as closed minded as you are and some other people may find it interesting

 

[John99]

You chose to follow the "teachings (dictates) of the church" ie its way to maintain power and nothing i can say will change that.

I would like to know how you could possibly know that but i dont go to any church so right there tells me you dont know much.

The only reason i posted any of that is because not everyone is as closed minded as you are and some other people may find it interesting

I am far from closed minded but i think you are very gullible and impressionable. You have more to learn than you think.

 

[Truenemo1889]

Hello Everyone,

I appreciate the the ton of feedback I got on this subject. I will try to keep an open mind about the relationship. She is a very kind and caring individual, I can understand that she opposes porn.
But I seem to disagree on the masturbation thing. According to the bible no one should "spill their seed". She considers such acts selfish, since they concentrate on one partner in the relationship. Later down the road this porn/masturbation/fetish attitude has the potential to destabilize or destroy the relationship. She wants me to promise her that I will not masturbate anymore, that I wont watch any porn or fetish material. I am doing well on the porn front but not so good on the masturbation fetish front. I don't really think I can or should change her mind on the subject.
And my girlfriend is Seventh Day Adventist.

 

[Bells]

Hello Everyone,

I appreciate the the ton of feedback I got on this subject. I will try to keep an open mind about the relationship. She is a very kind and caring individual, I can understand that she opposes porn.

If she was understanding and caring, she would not make such demands upon you. Porn maybe. She is well within her rights to say she doesn't want porn in the house. But masturbation? No. She has no right to tell you that you aren't allowed to masturbate and a caring and understanding individual would never make such demands upon another person.

According to the bible no one should "spill their seed". She considers such acts selfish, since they concentrate on one partner in the relationship.

:bugeye:

The Bible also says in some parts that women are inferior to men and should at all times be submissive to their husbands. Just because it says so in the Bible does not mean it is right.

Later down the road this porn/masturbation/fetish attitude has the potential to destabilize or destroy the relationship.

Yes.

She wants me to promise her that I will not masturbate anymore, that I wont watch any porn or fetish material. I am doing well on the porn front but not so good on the masturbation fetish front. I don't really think I can or should change her mind on the subject.
And my girlfriend is Seventh Day Adventist.

Run.

Far and fast.

Seriously, get the hell out of there. End the relationship now before it becomes an issue. And believe me, it will become an issue. If she is unwilling to change her mind, especially on masturbation, end it as soon as you can. I believe this has been stated numerous times in this thread already. The advice is still the same.

 

[lepustimidus]

Bells:

She is well within her rights to say she doesn't want porn in the house.

What the fuck? Looking at pornography is a personal thing (unless the viewer makes the conscious choice to include their partner), and as long as it is legal, is none of their business. To prevent your partner from engaging in something legal that doesn't effect you is controlling to the extreme. It's the equivalent of demanding that your wife doesn't watch Rodney Rude DVD's, because you find his humour crude, offensive and obscene.

But masturbation? No. She has no right to tell you that you aren't allowed to masturbate and a caring and understanding individual would never make such demands upon another person.

Wait, it's OK for his gf to make demands about not looking at porn, but not to make demands regarding masturbation? Why not? She believes that both are against her religion, hence are morally reprehensible.

Truenemo:

And my girlfriend is Seventh Day Adventist.

Well, that explains it.

If you have any balls whatsoever, you will simply leave the relationship. Because if you don't, as your relationship progresses, she will use sex to control you. You'll be completely reliant on her, because you promised her you wouldn't jack off. You'll essentially be a sex slave. And what happens if she never wants to have sex? You're fucked then, aren't you?

It doesn't matter how nice she PRETENDS to be, don't be fooled. If she's this controlling BEFORE you two are married, she'll be even more controlling AFTER. See the signs, and break it off with her.

 

[Reiku]

Hello Everyone,

I would need some advice on an issue. My girlfriend (23) does not what to engage in any sexual activity before marriage because of her religious conviction, which frustrates me (25). I myself, don't want to have sex yet but i would not mind to engage in some petting/mutual masturbation. She also does not want me to masturbate by myself.

I threw away all of my porn,fetish materials in the process of keeping her. I can understand that in the process of making porn a lot of people get exploited. And that porn can be seen as immoral for such a reason. But what about masturbation?

I love her and I want to respect her wishes but sometimes the not doing anything, and the no stimulating materials thing annoys me a lot. What do you all suggest I should do, what are your opinions on this, and what type of personal experience did you all have with your partners concerning masturbation and/or porn/fetish materials? I would appreciate any advice. Thank You!

Well, you could force her, but that is considered rape, i think, no matter what county or country you are in, so there are two solutions:

A) Accept it, move on

B) Get a New Girlfreind...

Niether would be profitable from your case, but that is what love is all about -- SACRFICE.

 

[James R]

What the fuck? Looking at pornography is a personal thing (unless the viewer makes the conscious choice to include their partner), and as long as it is legal, is none of their business.

Wrong. In a true relationship, partners negotiate about what are the acceptable boundaries of behaviour. If there are sticking points, the relationship cannot last without one of the two giving in or both reaching a compromise.

By assuming that one partner can dominate the other due to some kind of "right", you show merely that you've most likely never had a serious relationship in your life.

To prevent your partner from engaging in something legal that doesn't effect you is controlling to the extreme.

Why do you assume that looking at porn doesn't affect your partner?

And is porn really that important to you? Are you addicted?

 

[Reiku]

You can be addicted to sex... not so much porn itself.

 

[MetaKron]

James, you really are a pussy, aren't you?

 

[James R]

MetaKron:

What are you talking about? You're not making any more sense than usual.

 

[Reiku]

Well James, i'm sure you'll be ejaculating all over your computer screen when you have bannished me for good in less than 24 hours now.

 

[lepustimidus]

James R:

Wrong. In a true relationship, partners negotiate about what are the acceptable boundaries of behaviour.

So you think that his girlfriend is justified in asking him to abstain from masturbating? Do you think he would be justified in asking her vagina to be open to him 24/7, given her demands on masturbation and porn viewing? Do you think he would be justified in asking her to remove all Bibles from the house, because as an atheist he finds their material offensive?

If there are sticking points, the relationship cannot last without one of the two giving in or both reaching a compromise.

Yep, but my point is that if you have even a half decent partner, this issue SHOULDN'T be a sticking point, because viewing pornography and/or masturbation is a personal thing which doesn't effect your partner. And even if they 'aren't happy' with it, it's none of their business.

By assuming that one partner can dominate the other due to some kind of "right", you show merely that you've most likely never had a serious relationship in your life.

I challenge you to show where I said (or even implied) that one partner can dominate the other due to some kind of 'right'.

In case you missed this challenge, in nice big letters:

I challenge you to show where I said (or even implied) that one partner can dominate the other due to some kind of 'right'.

Otherwise, withdraw your statement and issue me an apology.

I also postulate this question: What right does this guy's gf have to dominate him by controlling whether he can masturbate and watch porn?

Why do you assume that looking at porn doesn't affect your partner?

Because it doesn't. And any feigned moral outrage on their part is just air.

And is porn really that important to you?
Are you addicted?

Is being dominated by a woman that important to you? Do you have a masochistic mindset which makes you an addict for abuse and mistreatment at the hands of the female gender? See, I can ask leading questions which misrepresent my opponent too!

But to clarify, the right to look at porn is important to me. I'm a free, autonomous human being, and should be allowed to make such a small choice without being harassed and abused by a controlling woman (this also applies in reverse, where women should be able to look at porn without being harassed by their male partner).

The notion that any woman would have the gall to restrict that right as a condition to remain with her turns my stomach. I might as well sign over my other rights, such as the right to piss standing up, to work out at the gym, and to talk to females other than my 'significant' other.

Quite simply, the demand to stop view porn is extremely controlling, intrusive and insulting.

 

[Reiku]

lol

 

[James R]

By assuming that one partner can dominate the other due to some kind of "right", you show merely that you've most likely never had a serious relationship in your life.

I challenge you to show where I said (or even implied) that one partner can dominate the other due to some kind of 'right'.

Ironically, you did it in the very post in which you complained so loudly:

But to clarify, the right to look at porn is important to me. I'm a free, autonomous human being, and should be allowed to make such a small choice without being harassed and abused by a controlling woman (this also applies in reverse, where women should be able to look at porn without being harassed by their male partner).

The notion that any woman would have the gall to restrict that right as a condition to remain with her turns my stomach.

Enough said.

 

[Fraggle Rocker]

Every adult must have the right to decide what to do with his or her body. This includes sex, drugs, food, haircuts and dyes, tattoos, suntans, riding motorcycles or other risky activities.

So if a man or a woman decides not to have intercourse or even foreplay before marriage that is his or her right. But it's also the partner's right to make that decision for him- or herself. So if they're not willing to wait, then that's their choice and it sounds like a stupid idea to continue the relationship. Sex is far too important for one person to have to give it up for the sake of another person's preferences.

As for masturbation, it's natural and healthy. No one has the right to tell you not to masturbate and if she does, she is one fucked-up little cookie and you should run very fast in the opposite direction. You don't want to get involved with a fucked-up little cookie!

My generation was taught that the prostate needs regular evacuation or it will get swollen, which is a major health problem that men shouldn't have to deal with until they're my age. For one thing it impairs urination. Today doctors are not quite unanimous in that advice but "better safe than sorry" sounds like a sensible way to live. Repressing yourself and getting release only in nocturnal emissions ("wet dreams") will make you one fucked-up little cookie. (Female sexuality is entirely different so failure to masturbate does not do them as much damage physically or psychologically, and there are arguably more women than men who do not masturbate regularly.)

Come on dude, there's a reason all those Muslimentalists are so angry and frustrated and crazy: they're fucked-up little cookies because they don't masturbate enough.

Do it for the sake of civilization. Make love, not war, even if it's solitary.

 

[Jozen-Bo]

Hello Everyone,

I would need some advice on an issue. My girlfriend (23) does not what to engage in any sexual activity before marriage because of her religious conviction, which frustrates me (25). I myself, don't want to have sex yet but i would not mind to engage in some petting/mutual masturbation. She also does not want me to masturbate by myself.

I threw away all of my porn,fetish materials in the process of keeping her. I can understand that in the process of making porn a lot of people get exploited. And that porn can be seen as immoral for such a reason. But what about masturbation?

I love her and I want to respect her wishes but sometimes the not doing anything, and the no stimulating materials thing annoys me a lot. What do you all suggest I should do, what are your opinions on this, and what type of personal experience did you all have with your partners concerning masturbation and/or porn/fetish materials? I would appreciate any advice. Thank You!

I am not going to give a direct answer.

Suffice it to say even though you love her, from what I have gathered this relationship is doomed to failure, as in the long run you will suffer much if you have to change for her. If you DON'T have to change for her, then there is a chance.

I know there will be no stopping you, so if the relationship does go anywhere, I leave it to you to find out the hard way...years from now.

 

[lepustimidus]

James retard, your dishonesty is monumental. Please explain how this statement:

The notion that any woman would have the gall to restrict that right [to look at pornography] as a condition to remain with her turns my stomach.

equates to claiming that:

"one partner can dominate the other due to some kind of 'right'."

In otherwords, explain to me how asserting that decent women shouldn't restrict a man's right to look at pornography as a condition to the continuation of their relationship = One partner has the right to dominate the other.

It's also worth noting that it's actually you championing the position that "one partner can dominate the other due to some kind of 'right'." . After all, you're implying that a woman has the right to dominate a man to prevent him from viewing pornography.

Ahhh, but I forgot. To liberal trash, it's good when a woman dominates a man. However, when a man dominates a woman, OH MY FUCKING GOD EVIL PATRIARCHY!

 

[James R]

It's also worth noting that it's actually you championing the position that "one partner can dominate the other due to some kind of 'right'." . After all, you're implying that a woman has the right to dominate a man to prevent him from viewing pornography.

Re-read my first post, where I carefully explained to you about negotiation and compromise in an equal relationship.

 

[lepustimidus]

James R:

Re-read my first post, where I carefully explained to you about negotiation and compromise in an equal relationship.

Not nice, having your views misrepresented, hey?