Good people. Bad people. Nature's force.

lixluke said:
No. He was a nice person that cared about her, and treated her nice. She treated him bad, and slept with whoever didn't care about her. Maybe he was clingy and such, but he didn't get upset until she treated him bad and slept with assholes. What do you expect him to say about it? It appears that he was there for her or willing to be there for her whenever she needed it. Meanwhile, she was never there for him, and treated him bad. Of course he would get upset. How is that being a douche bag?

Really, strong or weak physically or emotionally is irrelevant. Nothing else matters more than caring and being a good person. If she didn't like him for it, she's an idiot. But it appears that those who are good are inevitably compelled socially or in nature to strive to be the manipulative abusers that nature seems to reward.
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I cannot believe it but I agree with Clueless on this. The fact that he liked her and was 'nice' to her doesn't mean he earns her affections. She didn't like him romantically, she wasn't attracted, it probably wouldn't have mattered what he had done she wouldn't have been attracted, this being the case its an error to 'blame' her for not being able to give him what she was indeed unable to give him which was her affections. I remember once I went out with a guy who was really a nice guy, I didn't feel the slightest passion for him but I went out with him anyway. This proved to be a mistake and unfair in regards to him. I was completely indifferent towards him. Completely! He knew I didn't care and that was the worst part. When I let the relationship go I did so because I was beginning to resent him, he would never have let it go even though he knew I wasn't 'moved' towards him. He simply didn't fill me with emotion. In short I was as far away as being even remotely in love. She was doing him a favor by rejecting him believe me, if she had stayed with him he would have felt insecure anyway and it wouldn't have worked.

Men and women do not fall in love simply because someone is 'nice'.
 
Enmos said:
What's not fair about it ?
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I believe the phrase "nice guys finish last" can apply to the situation mentioned. Unfortunately, most of the time the assholes get exactly what they want and the good guys get left in the dust. That is what I meant.
 
Japarican said:
I believe the phrase "nice guys finish last" can apply to the situation mentioned. Unfortunately, most of the time the assholes get exactly what they want and the good guys get left in the dust. That is what I meant.
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Ok, fair enough. But that doesn't mean life isn't fair, it means humans aren't fair.
 
Oh come on Varda do we really have to go there? Can't we just stick to the guy and the steroids and the unrequited love thing?:D

And the little old ladies who get mugged while bringing food to the homeless, and the nice samaritan who is beaten up by young teenagers etc. You know easy stuff.
 
Varda said:
What is good? What is bad?
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Good - Not abusing/manipulating others for personal gain. Caring and being there for others.

Bad - Abusing and manipulating others for personal gain. Taking advantage of others.

cluelusshusbund said:
If somone you didnt desire romanticaly considered therself to be "nice" an wanted to have sex wit you... woud you be obligated to "sleep" wit 'em.???
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Nobody is obligated. I don't think it's about obligation. It's about manipulation. Like the girl might psychologically justify not getting involved with the nice guy that cares about her by projecting douche bag qualities upon him. And as long as her frame that he is a creep/douche bag is strong enough, he will actually believe it and live up to it subconsciously if not consciously. By looking at the situation from the outside, it appears to be a situation of control. It's often more about feeding ego. She manipulates the situation for her own because having somebody fawn over her feeds her ego. She can prey on his kindness by manipulating his feelings to make her feel superior.
 
Lucysnow said:
Oh come on Varda do we really have to go there? Can't we just stick to the guy and the steroids and the unrequited love thing?:D

And the little old ladies who get mugged while bringing food to the homeless, and the nice samaritan who is beaten up by young teenagers etc. You know easy stuff.
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The guy mugging might be just trying to bring food home, as well.
 
But you said she only wanted to be friends with him and even dated and slept other men, so how could she be manipulating him if she didn't even give him any inclination she was in a serious relationship with him? Its the guy who was being an idiot she was just being herself.
 
lixluke said:
She manipulates the situation for her own because having somebody fawn over her feeds her ego. She can prey on his kindness by manipulating his feelings to make her feel superior.
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So shes bein honest when she says she dont want nuthin to do wit him romanticaly or shes manipulatin him for personal gane... ether way... the guy has no good reason (other than bein a looser) to have kept hittin on her... cause she coudnt have been mor clear... I DONT CARE FOR YOU "IN A ROMANTIC WAY".!!!
 
Yes. Whatever the case may be. Bottom line:
Nice person did not get the girl. Got treated like trash instead, and eventually died.
Abusers got to have sex with the girl. Seem to get more and better things/experiences than the nice people.
 
Good...bad...it's all relative. If there is a "God" or "god/esses" then they must have one hell of a time sorting out who's actually truly evil and who actually truly deserves to go to "heaven". Don't we all think we are doing right by others in our own righteous actions? Don't all good intentions lead straight to the proverbial "hell"? Fuck it. This is why I don't believe in hell and I also think that evil and good ride a fine line. Who can truly decipher the pure meaning of "goodness"? As humans we can't fully comprehend the vast spectrum that is good/evil. There is no such thing on an individual level.
 
lixluke said:
Bottom line:
Nice person did not get the girl. Got treated like trash instead, and eventually died.
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If she was bein honest when she tolt him that she was not attracted to him romanticaly... what do you thank she shud have done diferently.???
 
lixluke said:
Yes. Whatever the case may be. Bottom line:
Nice person did not get the girl. Got treated like trash instead, and eventually died.
Abusers got to have sex with the girl. Seem to get more and better things/experiences than the nice people.
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You seem confused by it... but the world makes perfect sinse to me.!!!

Bein "nice" ant necesarly enuff to successfully woo a girl dependin on whatever baggage you mite be draggin... such as bein clingly whiny ugly... ect.!!!
 
cluelusshusbund said:
If she was bein honest when she tolt him that she was not attracted to him romanticaly... what do you thank she shud have done diferently.???
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cluelusshusbund said:
You seem confused by it... but the world makes perfect sinse to me.!!!

Bein "nice" ant necesarly enuff to successfully woo a girl dependin on whatever baggage you mite be draggin... such as bein clingly whiny ugly... ect.!!!
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No! It's not about her or what she should have done. It's about the situation itself. For whatever reason or whatever anybody 'should' have done, in the end, who finished last and who finished first?
 
lixluke said:
For whatever reason or whatever anybody 'should' have done, in the end, who finished last and who finished first?
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The looser finished last an the winer finished first.!!!

You label the looser as bein "nice"... but the juge that counts (the girl) sees the looser as "creepy".!!!
 
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