anonymous2 said:
I apologized to him if I offended him.
And if I offended you I apologize.
Well, I have to ask, how is it fair for a "loving" God to make me "crucify my flesh" (which to me means having a lobotomy, because should I have to apologize for my mind working [or not working] like it does), in order to get something uncertain in a future life? And if I don't, I get an eternal hell? If you can explain how making myself do and think things which are against how my mind works, and against my own will, as being fair, and if I don't, I get an eternal hell, then I'd like to hear it. And if it's not "fair", then how can you say "God is fair"? That's if you do say "God is fair".
You didn't offend me, and it is impossible to offend Him...He created everything and understands everything after all. He's above it all...literally...lol. Ok...first, He doesn't "make" you do anything. If you want to know Him, then He meets you where you are, wherever that may be. If you want to have a relationship with Him, then He's all for it, and He makes no conditions or stipulations regarding the relationship. If you want to learn from Him, then He's all about answering your questions...telling you the truth...and He does more than just verbally tell you things or explain things or instruct. He provides you with examples from your life. That's why I know that everything happens for a reason...the reason being to learn...which is the meaning of life...to seek the truth...to find it and to learn from it. And that's what I mean when I say that "I live it"...I learn from experience, and most usually the hard way...lol. But that's ok...not to say that I don't regret some things, but ultimately, I'm satisfied as long as I learn.
In my own personal experience, here's how it went...I was humbled in life...have been many times over actually, but eventually to the point in which I prayed...sincerely seeking the truth...whatever it was...I did not know. Even given all of my intellectualizing and theorizing and study of theology...I knew nothing of God FOR SURE. And I found that I HAD to know...I sincerely wanted to know, barring all consequences...whatever it meant for me...I didn't care...I had to know the truth. Did He really exist? Was Jesus really Him in the flesh? So I prayed at one point, "God, if you are real, then I want to know."...and it progressed from there..."God, if Jesus was your Son, and the Bible is true, then I want to know."..."God, if I can have a relationship with you, then I want to"..."God, I need you right now (pleading and crying on my knees)." And along the way, He answered all of my prayers...every single one...not that the above was all that I prayed. And He did it through my life experience...teaching me things. Things that really helped me alot.
So progressively, I came to know Him more and more, and to understand Him more and more, and to trust Him more and more. So, you don't end up going against your mind, but changing it in light of a new understanding. And it's strange...you don't realize how flawed your flesh is...including your brain...the way you "see" things...the things that you believe...until you come to know Him. In the Bible it talks about getting a new pair of eyes or something like that, and that's exactly how it seems. Knowing Him changes your perception systemically...it changes how you see and think about everything....not all at once necessarily, but progressively, more and more. The more He teaches you, the more positive effects that your learning produces in you and in your life...the more of your life that you give unto Him, the more He is able to "move" or "work" in your life, and He blesses you...this blesses you more and more. These positive changes that HE makes, not you, but Him...this is what the Bible calls "fruit of the Spirit". So progressively, you give Him more and more of yourself and your life, because you WANT to...because you love Him, and you trust Him, because you know Him, and you know that He is God, your Creator, and that He loves you beyond comprehension and unconditionally, and that He always, always acts in your best interest, and will always take care of you. He will provide for you, comfort you, redeem you, restore you...no job is too tough...no need too great...nothing is impossible with Him. And He always exceeds your expectations...what He has done for me has absolutely blown my mind to smithereens. Recently, with this miracle that I keep talking about...it's been about a year actually since it all started, and I still don't have my mind wrapped around it yet...it is still very surreal to me. Because what He has done in my life...with my life...and how He has blessed me is just so over the top...it's just amazing...mind blowing. Now, in the process, let me tell you...my life has been absolutely turned upside down. Seriously, in the past five years, my life has been blown to bits...the life of my flesh that is. There is nothing left of it but scattered debris here and there...it still surrounds me for the moment...and I look at it and shake my head and laugh in amuzement. I would really just like to set it all on fire and watch it burn...toast some vegan marshmallows in it maybe. Anyway, my point is this...that although it is painful and confusing at times, and is a challenge at times, He keeps you through it all. He is the One who takes it all on for you, and carries you through it. All you really have to do is want it, and He takes it from there. It's wanting it that your flesh will fight you about. But you KNOW that your flesh is a liar...you learn it more and more. You KNOW what is good for you, and what is true, and you trust in Him more and more. So you come to want Him and His will in your life more and more. You know that the easy road is never right. That everything worth while is a challenge. Besides...you only get one shot at this life of yours, and it's a short one...so why not go for it? What else do you have to do?
Oh, and trust me on this one...God is NOT fair...not at all. If God were fair, I would be dead and frying in hell right now. God is not about what you deserve, or what is fair...He is only about love and He shows it through His grace. Grace is unfair. Thank God.