Scivillage

I forgot about you. Depends on how risque you want to get I suppose. We've got two men, one woman, a tiger, an elephant, a robot, and some cannibals frolicking in the woods somewhere. Then, of course, you have the occasionally showing their faces crowd. Take your pick.

But if you pick the fish, I guess we'll come up with Swedish-Babel fish hybrids. What are the properties of a swedishfish?
 
scivillage report
spurious - outcast
'questions'

I went for tea and cake today to swedishfish. I was quietly sipping on my tea and munching on my cake when she suddenly made the statement:

"fish can have sex in this thread"

The mixture of tea and chewed cake that was in my mouth left my mouth with a great force with most of it landing on Swedishfish and the antique painting behind her on the wall depicting a Fish ancestor.

I quickly made my exit without saying anything leaving my bag with goodies behind.

I didn't even notice the tiger roaring at the side of the road.
 
Day-67
Today I woke up and some how I got super guitar skills. So I decided to become the town's musician also. :D
 
i tried making conversation with the monkey this afternoon during tea. we don't often chat much during tea so i wasn't sure what topic to choose. i figured bringing up that i am going to mate in this thread would be interesting. he didn't think so. maybe he thought i was inviting him to mate. fish and monkeys can't mate! i tried to call him and explain after cleaning off the painting of my grandfather but he wasn't at home. so i left a message saying "i don't want to have sex with you". i hope that clears things up. i've already extended an invitation to the whore, as i do everynight. but he still can't find my hut in the forest. i fear i may have to mate with one of the other fish ::shudders:: i'd rather not.
 
Out of sight i follow SwedishFish into the village, she headed straight for spuriousmonkeys hut, where after knocking several times on the door, she put a note on it and left.
Once SwedishFish had left, I walked over to the hut and took a closer look at the message, actually i ate part of the message, leaving only the "want to have sex with you".
 
I arrived at my hut...

it had a note on the door...

I trembled when I read it....

it said 'want to have sex with you'

There was only one thing to do...


I had a glass of scirum...

and another one...
 
I had an idea tonight. Maybe scirum would take care of the squeaking in my robot's joints. I sent him down to SpuriousMonkey's house to fetch some. I couldn't figure out how to make him say anything but "DEATH! MURDER! KILL!" So, instead I pinned a note to his chest. It read, "send excessive amount of scirum. Robot's squeaking is making me a maniac" Little did I know that it would begin raining as the robot made it's way to SpuriousMonkey's house, washing out many of the letters of the note, so that when he reached the house it would read SEX MANIAC.

SQUEAK, CLANK, SKRAWK, CLUMP, SKREECH....
 
i go away for a few days, and all the men can think of is reproducing......
....with fish?
This worries me a tad.
And a sex maniac robot? i don't even know where to start with that one....
Red, sweet and chewy sounds suspiciously like a redskin lolly.

Trip is going well. A lack of reproducing fish is noticed. No cannibals have been seen. Will reach village morrow.
 
(I'm sure Spurious will make a funny bit out of it. :p We need more chaos. Since I've been restraining myself in world-shaking events, I've got to get my kicks somehow. At least I didn't set him to DEATH! MURDER! KILL! mode first. :) )
 
Think of it as a security system that works REALLY well:-D

Trip is good. Arrived at village. Managed to get some materials for myself, as well as SciSambuca. Also swapped them for some furs and live sqid for the pond. The gentleman who's journal i had returned decided to accompany me on the trip back, to see our village. I'll be back tomorrow
 
first day of self awareness was great, i met a very nice lady who returned my lost journal to me. i hope she didn't read much of it, its got my darkest secrets in it, regardless i decided to accompany her back to her village, ill arrive tomorrow
 
I think I had been drinking too much scirum.

A robot was knocking on my door. It had a note on its chest. it said: 'EX MAN'

My god...the poor thing...this brave man had died and someone had put his brain in this horrible machine. He used to be a robot and now he is a man.

I took him to swedishfish for tea and cake. Nobody said anything, unless you count the sqeaking of the robot as small conversation. I looked mostly at the wall. Swedishfish was staring at me as if she wanted to say something urgent, but couldn't find the words to do so. Finally she spoke.

'Your robot needs some oil'

'yes, he does, doesn't he.'
 
Made it back to the village in one piece, no cannabals this time. Took Alain with me, and intro'd him to peoples. I can hear the robot squeakn from here. eieik
 
My robot has not made it home from SpuriousMonkey's house. I am unsure whether I should be concerned or grateful. Just then, I see Spurious and the robot clumping along like best friends. A possessive streak flares within me. Hey, that's my robot. Then, I see Sexy Blue return from her trip. A man accompanies her. Hmm, who's that? Jealousy flares within me. First my robot, then my sunbathing beauty. Maybe I should wear all black and act like a moody teenager for awhile. Yeah, that's sure to solve all my problems.
 
it's just not your day, inv. But i did bring some oil for you.
Back to the workshop. I left Alian to find himself somewhere to sleep, and continued on my gliders. Various people came and picked up their articles and such like
 
walks over to invert nexus and says hi to him, he gives a grunt which could either have been a hi or a piss off. not to be disuaded, i continue to talk to him, he mutters something about sunbathing partner, i wonder who he could mean by that...
 
The robot is quickly turning into my best friend. I like the fact that it doesn't speak. He just shuffles along just behind me. I gave him my bag for it to carry. It didn't seem to mind. I then loaded it with firewood for my distillery. Not a squeek of protest emanating from it.

'Hey buddy, want a drink?'

'No?...I thought so...Don't mind if I will have one.'
 
Sexy Blue gave me some oil for the robot. That's a relief. If only I still had him. (And I was hoping for an hysterical reaction from Spurious. :p You let me down, man. :) )

Then the new guy comes over and tries talkin' to me. I start sayin stuff like, whatever, it's cool, and use "like" alot. I feel somewhat foolish. I wonder how long I can keep up the teenager act. Alain actually seems like an alright guy...

But, no, I gotta stick to my guns. I asked him if he's ever like played chicken with an elephant. I tell him like all the cool guys around here do it. He want's to be like cool, doesn't he?

The new guy seems somewhat confused by my behavior, but he agrees that he does want to be cool. I tell him to meet me at dead man's curve tomorrow at midnight. BYOE, man. Bring your own Elephant.

I jump up on Flossie and try to get him (strange that he's a him, I originally meant it to be a her, but a huge elephant schlong can't be missed and Kunax already identified it) to spin his wheels in a cool way. Too bad he doesn't have wheels and I just end up looking foolish in my attempt. I attempt to bolster my confidence by telling myself that at least Flossie's stickin' by me. A man and his elephant. That's me. Cool, man.
 
I put a flower pot on top of the robots head. It looks more cheerful now.

I also gave it some pants. I hate naked robots. So humiliating.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top