Revenge

"OUCH!" Said Adam.

"OUCH, MEEAOW!" Said Fritz.

"OUCH!" Said something else.

"Huh, who said that?" Said Adam, looking around him. All he could see were rows and rows of corn stalks swaying in the breeze and smiling at him. 'Smiling?' He thought, scratching a scab on his head in amazement.

"Eugh, you shouldn't do that, it won't heal otherwise!" Said the corn plant.

"I've seen a lot of shit these past few days, weeks, whatever", said Adam, "but I've never seen a talking plant before."

"You ever see an elephant fly?" Said Corn.

"No, I don't believe I have!" Said Adam.

"Correct! The only flies round here are bluebottles." Said Corn sniggering.

"Ts! Corny." Said Fritz, getting down to some serious grooming of his nether regions.

"You two should have died last week" said Corn.

"Waddaya mean?"

"Well, there seems to be a profound lack of interest in you from your creators and I don't think you should have dropped out of the truck, I think you were meant to die at the hands of hampster's vengeful wrath and got done with it!"

"How come you know so much then?"

Corn laughed, "I keep my ears close to the ground."

Fritz looked at Corn and rolled his wild looking eyes.

"So what happens now?" Said Adam.

"Now, the future is yours to make as you wish."

"Can't I just sleep this off? I seem to have been trippin' for weeks and I'm really fed up with it. You see, I don't really enjoy hallucinating, I'm a lager man actually, an aficionado of the golden nectar, it's only my gluttony for jam rolls that got me into this mess in the first place."

"Yes, but what you don't realise is that up to now, your er, trip as you call it, has been manipulated by forces outside your control, forces from another dimension."

"Up to now?"

"Yes. Most of them think you died in the truck, you see? You were never really in charge of your destiny, just a mere puppet providing amusement to the unmentionables out there somewhere. Well, now you'll find that things will begin to make more sense as time goes by."

"How long before I'm sober again, any ideas?"

Just then, an unmentionable from out there somewhere decided to check on Adam in the truck, little realising that he was too late, Adam was now a free man! Or was he?
 
...The unmentionable whistled cheerfully while approaching the truck. He came down from heaven yesterday and was so very pleased he managed to leave that boring place. Jumping up and down with joy, his feet barely touched the ground. Oh, how he loved to take the old, broken "puppets" away from the hands of God. He stopped at the back of the truck, a foggy figure in a dark-grey cloak. And opened the flaps to get in.

"Pleased to meet you. Hope you guess my name!" Unmentionable said with a gritty voice."And what's puzzling you, is just the nature of my game!"

Speaking the last words, Unmentionable realised with a certain shock, his "puppets" were not there. In stead of them, he found God, struggling with Hampster. "God!," he roared with a thundering voice. "Are you playing my game again?!"

God, just busy to strangle Hampster single handedly, turned to Unmentionable. "I am just finishing things off here," God replied grinning. "It was good playing around with your "puppets", a nice change after all the goods I gave to these Earth-lings for so long." God rose from the truck floor and wiped the dust of the leather outfit. "Well, excuse me now, for I'm gonna kiss the sky." With that God took off, leaving Unmentionable speechless with rage.

In the meantime, Adam and Fritz were coming out of the Cornfield, back on the yellow brick road. Adam sighed with relief. "Oh I'm so very glad this is all over with ," he said to Fritz. "I'm going to lay down and sleep this whole freakin' trip off." He looked around to find a place, to rest his spinning head and tired body. "The future is mine to make, whatever I want it to be." And that was what Corn had told him.

Fritz and Adam passed the truck and hardly looked at it. When the flaps opened with a hard blow, they, at first, didn't even realise it. Adam had the same blissful gleam in his eyes from before and Fritz walked purring, besides him.

At once, a dark cloud surrounded them and a lightning beam came out of it. It struck them from above and Adam was smashed to the ground. Fritz nearly escaped and began to ran as fast as his four paws could run.

Adam felt something land on his back with a bang. "OMFG!," he thought, "This is not happening. I didn't want my future to start like this!"

Four, long fingers clawed in his face, four fingers, coming from two hands. His head was bend backward and the tears sprang to his eyes. Unmentionable roared in his ears...
 
Four, long fingers clawed in his face, four fingers, coming from two hands. His head was bend backward and the tears sprang to his eyes. Unmentionable roared in his ears...

I hate close-talkers...
 
Adam smelled its foul breath in his face and puked a yellow stream of vomit onto his opponent.

"YUUUUCKS! You're disgusting!" It screamed and disappeared in a flash of light that smelled like gunpowder.

"God what's happening to me?" Adam said spitting bits of crap out of his mouth. "I wish I could just get drunk and have some horny chick give me a rub down! Hey Fritz, didn't you say we were going to see your main pussy? What the hell we're waiting for then?"

"Just follow me and try to keep out of trouble", said Fritz as they set off down the yellow brick road singing an old Judy Garland song. In the cornfield something stirred as it watched them approaching in its direction...
 
In the cornfield something stirred as it watched them approaching in its direction...

Happily smiling, Fritz took Adam's hand and lead him along the yellow brick road, convinced they would finally get to his beloved pussy.

In the cornfield, stood a scarecrow, with strange eyes that followed closely what Fritz and Adam were doing. It listened and hissed with delight. Slowly it started to move, its strawy face stirred with a devilish smile.

Tn the meantime Fritz and Adam went down the road and in the distance there was a smoke plume visible. "What's that smoke?". Adam asked. "Well my friend, that's where we're going. That's where my pussy is!", Fritz replied with joy in his cattish voice. "Beer there is too and some good Grass to smoke. Man, now that's bliss!". Fritz jumped up and down from excitement.

In the cornfield the scarecrow approached them, hissing and drooling. His coalblack eyes glowed with an unearthly light in them. He sneaked up on the two friends, slowly, carefully, its strawy hands clenching, ready to grab...
 
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