Jokes and Funny Stories II

vObhjnb.jpg
 
One from the Xmas cracker brigade:

Q: Why don't people make belts out of watches?
A: Because they're a waist of time.
 
geordief said:
Made me smile ,anyway
Click to expand...
Here's a story that made me laugh at what some people would do to protect their right to have guns.

The joke being Alex Jones has been saying these things and yet would probably be considered sane enough (by some) to own a gun himself.

Aug 5 (Reuters) - A jury in Austin, Texas, decided on Friday that U.S. conspiracy theorist Alex Jones must pay the parents of a child killed in the 2012 Sandy Hook massacre $45.2 million in punitive damages for falsely claiming the shooting was a hoax, on top of $4.1 million in compensatory damages....

….Jones had called the shooting a hoax by the U.S. government, staged using crisis actors to serve as a pretext for taking away Americans' guns. He has since acknowledged that the massacre was real....

…..Here are some of the other legal challenges Jones and his company now face.
Click to expand...

https://www.reuters.com/business/media-telecom/whats-next-conspiracy-theorist-alex-jones-2022-08-05/
 
Michael 345 said:
View attachment 5048

Must be messy taking them off and using the sewing machine to tailor them

:)
Click to expand...
George went to a tailor shop to get measured for a custom-made suit. The tailor told him it would be ready on Friday.

On Friday, George returned to try on the suit. He said, "Um... the crease on one leg seems to be crooked." The tailor replied, "No problem. Just turn your foot to point in the direction of the crease."

So George turned his foot. Then he added, "And one sleeve seems to be longer than the other." The tailor replied, "No problem. Just pull it up and bend your arm to hold it."

So George pulled up the sleeve and bent his arm. Then he continued, "And one shoulder seems to be higher than the other." The tailor replied, "No problem. Just hold it down with your chin."

So George wore the suit home. On the way, with his chin on his shoulder and his arm bent to clutch his sleeve and dragging his turned foot, he ran into an old friend. "What happened to you?" his friend asked. "You look terrible! Nice suit though."
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top