NEW HAVEN, CT—In a diagnosis that helps explain the confusing and contradictory aspects of the cosmos that have baffled philosophers, theologians, and other students of the human condition for millennia, God, creator of the universe and longtime deity to billions of followers, was found Monday to suffer from bipolar disorder.
I just decided to take this moment to say that the donations for the Gift to God have reached a grand to total of $0. At this rate we will reach our goal in a infinite number of years.
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