Hello all - it's nice to be here
. Just trying to reclarify my position:
When I said it was a purely personal thing, I accept that it can be caused by external forces - most overwhelming stress is - the reasons for doing it are not to prove anything to the world, or to appeal to it.
You are correct in saying that people sometimes self-harm to give a physical manifestation of their emotional needs. What little I read suggests 3 main reasons for this:
1. Physical injury releases endorphins which naturally calm the person.
2. Physical injury can be seen as 'fake pain' - while it hurts more, it is easier to deal with than the real emotional pain. I [perhaps wrongly] make the analogy between this and when I get a bee/nettle sting, it actually feels less painful if I pinch the area - because this pain feels less severe.
3. It is easier to nurture physical injury, and being able to take care of yourself can be emotionally rewarding.
It is very rare that people who self-harm will show off their scars while feeling the stress - people who used to self-harm but no longer need it are less secretive - but just because they're making something tangible does not mean that they are doing this in order to show someone.
When I am talking about this, I am not talking about people cutting themselves to be cool - I do not doubt that this exists, but this is different to self-harm, for the reasons I stated above. That type of cutting is stupid and 'folding to peer-pressure', whereas self-harm can be a rational action to take.
On the same subject, I've never heard of it as 'deliberate self-harm syndrome', or seen the people who use this tool as sufferers. Certainly they are under such stress in other places that they feel the need to take this extreme measure to alleviate it, but I don't think that it is an illness. Instead, it's a payoff between stress and pain which people rationally choose, while dreaming of a time when the stress isn't so bad that they have to use this.
Bill