wow this may be the first god thread in which "defecate" was not part of an ad hom
I'm sure you guys have better ones. I am familiar with, "If God is Almighty, can he create a stone which he CANNOT carry?"
God can not solve for x and y such that x=y and x≠y.
God can not have existed forever, as He would be forever approaching the present asymptotically.
The God of this very moment ... *now*... can not time travel to the moment he is telling Moses "I am the Lord your God", (i.e. coexist with himself) without lying.
God could not say "Let there be light" in Hebrew, since the language wasn't invented yet.
Before God said "let there be light" there was no light, only darkness. Therefore darkness existed forever. Therefore darkness can not be created.
That is, even God can't create darkness.
God can't create nothing.
God can't create "round" or "flat" or "ugly".
God can not draw a line that occupies 1cubic centimeter.
God can not do anything faster than the speed of light.
God can't guess.
God can't go online and argue here against his existence.
God can't make Rush Limbaugh "the Most Interesting Man in the World".
God can't commit suicide. Oh wait: Jesus. Uh, no, that's a keeper after all.
God can't uncrucify Jesus, and reinvent him as Adolf Hitler, Charles Manson and Osama Bin Laden.
God can't make me greater than Him.
God can not get down on his knees and beg for forgiveness, do 3 donkey kicks, lick my boots, and say: "Oh what a goose I am", while opening a brothel on every street corner in America.
God can't make you do anything. He can't make you hate him. He can't make you burn down a church, or use the Bible as emergency toilet paper.
God can't destroy Heaven.
God can't slap Jesus in the face.
God can't have an accident.
God can not: pray to Baal, or love Satan, lie, steal, commit adultery, or kill. Oh, wait: God can kill. OK so there's one thing he can do. Maybe he can lie, too. But I'm pretty sure he can't commit adultery.
God can not: turn himself into
Gumby, with chewing gum legs, and make it the only chewing gum in the universe, and then walk and chew gum at the same time.
God can't take the apostrophe out of "can't".
God can't tell me what he can't do.
God can not do anything on demand. For example, when I snap my fingers, God can not appear before me, impersonating
Father Guido Sarducci,
*snap*. see, nothing. He can't do it for you either. Try it.