I am going to be an Atheist Preacher

S

Starman

Starman
Registered Senior Member
I am going to be an Atheist Preacher at my new Atheist church.

I am going to open my doors directly across the street from the largest Christian Church in San Antonio.

I am going to put a sign out front that reads.

"SALE Tithes only 5%"
 
man you wouldn't need low prices at all. just put 'we won't tell you what to do OR judge you for it! cos it won't matter when your dead anyway! we've got sex, drugs and gambling!'
 
I'm an atheist.

You're just children with cans of rhetorical spray paint.

Grow up. Buy a vowel.
 
Why not not worship Richard Dawkins, who is not the son of God.
Have pictures of him nowhere. That kind of thing.
 
Captain Kremmen said:
Why not not worship Richard Dawkins, who is not the son of God.
Have pictures of him nowhere. That kind of thing.
Click to expand...

I like the Idea of slot machines, Texas Holdem, for the kids.

We need a good Rock Band.

We are going to pioneer self help groups. A ONE STEP program. We will call it
Stop Doing Stupid Shit program or SDSS for short.
 
Great idea, and I was thinking about becoming a door-to-door atheist to show those jehovah's witness what it's like having annoying bastards standing at your door at 1 in the afternoon.
 
Captain Kremmen said:
Why not not worship Richard Dawkins, who is not the son of God.
Have pictures of him nowhere. That kind of thing.
Click to expand...
*************
M*W: Or, rip out the pages of a Holy Bible and call it the Wholy Bible, and leave it on the coffee table.

Or, get dressed up on Sunday and go out to McDonald's.

Or, go to a religious bookstore and leave atheist tracts hidden in the books.

Or, go house-to-house on a Saturday afternoon and whomever opens the door tell them to "have a nice day," and then leave.

Or, go to any place of worship of your choice when it's not in session, and leave atheist tracts in the pews.

BTW, does anybody know if atheist tracts are published? I'd like to order some.

Or, better yet, I'll draft the atheist tract and print them and I will be taking your orders soon.

Atheists Unite!
 
I think you have already a church (as an institution):
Your gods are the well known scientists such as Einstein
Your ONE GOD is reality
Your priest are the medium scientists
Your prayers are the medicine
Your bible is books from well known scientists
Your temples are a good place out the city maybe, in nature
Your temples are also maybe the scientific conferences

But if you want a church to express in other way your believes, check these links found with the keywords: atheist church ;-)
3 churches:
http://factschurch.com/
http://firstchurchofatheism.com/
http://simiantology.com/

some articles:
http://themoderatevoice.com/religion/ideologies/secularists/19214/the-church-of-atheism/
http://www.wired.com/wired/archive/14.11/atheism.html
http://nymag.com/news/features/46214/
http://www.rationalresponders.com/church_of_atheism
http://www.acfnewsource.org/religion/atheist_church.html
 
tim840 said:
Why are you all so bitter towards Christians? :shrug:
Click to expand...
*************
M*W: I'm sick and tired of hearing the word "bitter" from christians on this forum. Just because we don't believe the crap you do doesn't make us bitter at all. What you conceive to be "bitter" translates in christianity to:

"unproven"
"illogical"
"idiotic"
"fictional"
"allegorical"
"metaphorical"
"fabulous"
"unbelievable"

Do you believe in the tooth fairy and Santa Claus, too?
 
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