Coming out as an Atheist

Xerxes said:
Yes. Especially the ones that believe in an afterlife.
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I need you to explain that to me please. I don't understand how belief in an afterlife devalues a person. But then maybe I don't understand what devalues means. lol
 
Because, false beliefs are a kind of prison (the worst kind in my opinion) and you cannot fully experience life while trapped in a prison. This causes people to remain small and ignorant. Because they sacrifice truth for comfort, they will never appreciate what life has to offer

The people who believe in an afterlife are worse off because they view their lives with a special kind of contempt ("you have to behave this way, OR ELSE!").
 
Gondolin said:
Has anybody had any experience with this? I've been an atheist since I was 17, but I've never had the guts to tell my family. They're all theists and I'm afraid they would look down on me if I came out and told them this.

Right now I feel like it's better if they don't know. It just makes things easier, but I'm going to get to the point where I'm gonna have to tell them and I was just wondering if anybody here has had to do what I'm talking about.

Most of my friends know... that is the ones I can trust to keep their mouths shut.

Any experiences would be great.
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I have had this experience. I was raised Southern Baptist in Texas. I believed in Jesus and all that shit wholeheartedly. It took me until I was in my late 20's to start questioning it seriously (though I'd had doubts since my late teens), and it took me a further 4-5 years to reject the whole concept of god.

When I told my family that I didn't believe in god anymore (and they are all very strict/strong believers), they were in a kind of denial. They couldn't believe I was honest. They seemed to be in disbelief. They thought I was just trying to get attention or something, I guess. To this day, they act like I've gone a bit mental or something, tend to treat me like a pitiable leper or something. I'm sure they think I'll change my mind someday, but they just can't or won't see my point of view. My mom says that she couldn't live without the hope that "god" gives her, which is the closest I've gotten any of them to come to entertaining the idea of no "god."

It's not fun, but I think it's important to let them know. I feel like I'm being more honest with myself and the world. I think it's necessary if we are ever going to be able to break the hold that religion has on us and move on into a better future than we were given.

Who knows, maybe someone else in your family feels the same way you do? You won't find out unless you open up. It's your decision though. :)
 
Well for the time being, I think it would make things a lot easier if I just kept it quiet. I'll tell them in due time, and like I said, a lot of people around me know, so I'm not hiding from it 100%.
 
Gondolin said:
Well for the time being, I think it would make things a lot easier if I just kept it quiet. I'll tell them in due time, and like I said, a lot of people around me know, so I'm not hiding from it 100%.
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Is there anything to hide from?
Okay - I can appreciate not wanting to hurt some people's feelings - but that is not hiding from it.
Hiding from it would be to deny your lack of belief when asked.
All you seem to be doing is not announcing it to those that you know it would hurt... not through some sense of "sin" or "fear of God" on your part - but merely 'cos you respect these peoples' beliefs (or at least their right to those beliefs) and you know that it would hurt some peoples' feelings.

That's natural and within your own remit to assess as being the right thing to do or not.
I told my parents, when asked, and immediate family (brother / sister etc) - but didn't tell my devoutly Catholic Grandmother until much later - as I knew it would hurt her - and it did - still does.

There's always a time, place and way to break the news to people that you've started to think rationally. You'll know when/where/how it is. :D
 
Maybe hiding was a poor choice of words.

But you get what I'm talking about.
 
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I thought this thread would be an appropriate place to share; word got around to my parents that I am an atheist and last night, they called me into their room and we had a two hour discussion about how I could possibly be an atheist. I've got to say, my parents are quite liberal for Christians, and they provide some very intriguing conclusions that are infinitely more intellectually stimulating (and not to mention reasonable) than the logical drivel we get from theists here on this message board.

A good chat.
 
Care to share?

I'm assuming they were insufficient arguments to persuade you back?
 
Sarkus said:
Care to share?

I'm assuming they were insufficient arguments to persuade you back?
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Of course they were insufficient, if you want to get pedantic, the conversation ended because I out witted both of them ("I'm getting to tired too think straight.") Granted, I am younger and my mind is more active and yadda yadda. Either way, I don't think it's of use to approach the talk from a 'win' or 'lose' ultimatum.

I don't know if I could replicate their arguments from scratch here and now...it might suffice to say that they are extremely liberal Christians who focus entirely on spirituality, not religion (they actually despise it).

What I could do is respond to your questions from their perspective; there was a time when I thought along the same times as they did. Therefore--and I don't think it arrogant to say this--I am able to understand their viewpoints wholly and can attempt to show them why and how I differ.

Posing as a theist to show that I can come up with better arguments for theism...this might be a good idea for a thread....
 
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