Socratic Spelunker
Registered Senior Member
I haven't read the books and I kinda refuse to, but I would like to write an article called "Why Edward probably beats Bella."
I was reading a book by David J. Lieberman and there were some warning signs that a man will likely become physically abusive and even not having read the books, I recognized some of them as applying to Edward, but I would like specific textual examples if possible. So here are the criteria... Some are obviously applicable, but like I say, I would like page numbers and quotes where possible.
How does he talk about his childhood, parents, siblings, other relatives, childhood friends, and so on? A person who speaks harshly about his childhood or relatives, using strong, perhaps violent language, clearly has unresolved issues that could lead to explosive consequences.
Has he ever been abused? Robert Ressler, the FBI behavioral scientist who coined the term “serial killer,” states in Whoever Fights Monsters (1993) that a startling 100 percent of serial killers have been abused as children by way of violence, neglect, or humiliation. We are not suggesting that a victim of abuse will become an abuser, but statistically speaking, it is more likely that he will hurt another person because he was a victim himself.
Does he tend to use force or violence in an attempt to resolve challenges? Will the person walk away from a fight or try to diffuse it verbally, as opposed to resorting to physical conflict?
Does he overreact to little things and assume a personal motivation? For instance, after the cashier gives him the wrong change … does he become enraged, believing the motivation was intentional and personal?
Is he cruel to animals, or for that matter, people? Does he say hurtful things or seek to to embarrass or humiliate others, particularly those who cannot easily defend themselves?
Does he drink excessively, … or engage in risk taking behavior without regard for his own or others' safety and welfare?
A little jealousy may be sweet – too much is poison. Jealousy has less to do with how a person feels towards you and more to do with how he feels about himself. It is an unhealthy emotion rooted in insecurity. Does he keep tabs on you and want to know where you are at all times? If he is jealous of others … be aware. Furthermore, if he tries to restrict or control your time with friends and family, you're headed for a very serious problem.
Are you scared in any way? Does he threaten you, or are you concerned about what he would do if you broke up with him? Does he ever, under the guise of joking, say something like, “I could never leave without you and you wouldn't either.” Similar comments are not loving, they are cause for concern.
Watch out for the two-faces person; if his personality is inconsistent, be on the alert. He may act nicely to you and poorly to others. [This] is a concern because he is adjusting his conduct toward you for his own gain; his behavior is not a reflection of his true nature. How he treats others when he does not need anything from them is a stronger indicator of a core personality … These interactions are good indicators of his real character.
If he is verbally abusive in any way, you should be advised physical abuse is not far behind. While it may remain as verbal, the odds aren't in your favor.
In the beginning of the relationship, did he come on too strong too fast and become preoccupied with you and everything about you? While you may be flattered, you should be concerned. He doesn't have a realistic outlook about the relationship and is placing far more emphasis and attention than is warranted far a new relationship. His behavior is indicative of a person who is not seeing reality very clearly.
Have your friends or family told you that they do not like him or that there “is just something about him” they don't quite like but can't put a finger on? If so, you may have lost perspective.
Thank you in advance!
I was reading a book by David J. Lieberman and there were some warning signs that a man will likely become physically abusive and even not having read the books, I recognized some of them as applying to Edward, but I would like specific textual examples if possible. So here are the criteria... Some are obviously applicable, but like I say, I would like page numbers and quotes where possible.
How does he talk about his childhood, parents, siblings, other relatives, childhood friends, and so on? A person who speaks harshly about his childhood or relatives, using strong, perhaps violent language, clearly has unresolved issues that could lead to explosive consequences.
Has he ever been abused? Robert Ressler, the FBI behavioral scientist who coined the term “serial killer,” states in Whoever Fights Monsters (1993) that a startling 100 percent of serial killers have been abused as children by way of violence, neglect, or humiliation. We are not suggesting that a victim of abuse will become an abuser, but statistically speaking, it is more likely that he will hurt another person because he was a victim himself.
Does he tend to use force or violence in an attempt to resolve challenges? Will the person walk away from a fight or try to diffuse it verbally, as opposed to resorting to physical conflict?
Does he overreact to little things and assume a personal motivation? For instance, after the cashier gives him the wrong change … does he become enraged, believing the motivation was intentional and personal?
Is he cruel to animals, or for that matter, people? Does he say hurtful things or seek to to embarrass or humiliate others, particularly those who cannot easily defend themselves?
Does he drink excessively, … or engage in risk taking behavior without regard for his own or others' safety and welfare?
A little jealousy may be sweet – too much is poison. Jealousy has less to do with how a person feels towards you and more to do with how he feels about himself. It is an unhealthy emotion rooted in insecurity. Does he keep tabs on you and want to know where you are at all times? If he is jealous of others … be aware. Furthermore, if he tries to restrict or control your time with friends and family, you're headed for a very serious problem.
Are you scared in any way? Does he threaten you, or are you concerned about what he would do if you broke up with him? Does he ever, under the guise of joking, say something like, “I could never leave without you and you wouldn't either.” Similar comments are not loving, they are cause for concern.
Watch out for the two-faces person; if his personality is inconsistent, be on the alert. He may act nicely to you and poorly to others. [This] is a concern because he is adjusting his conduct toward you for his own gain; his behavior is not a reflection of his true nature. How he treats others when he does not need anything from them is a stronger indicator of a core personality … These interactions are good indicators of his real character.
If he is verbally abusive in any way, you should be advised physical abuse is not far behind. While it may remain as verbal, the odds aren't in your favor.
In the beginning of the relationship, did he come on too strong too fast and become preoccupied with you and everything about you? While you may be flattered, you should be concerned. He doesn't have a realistic outlook about the relationship and is placing far more emphasis and attention than is warranted far a new relationship. His behavior is indicative of a person who is not seeing reality very clearly.
Have your friends or family told you that they do not like him or that there “is just something about him” they don't quite like but can't put a finger on? If so, you may have lost perspective.
Thank you in advance!
