Scivillage

SCIVILLAGE
report by: Outcast- spuriousmonkey
Day 5 - 'The saga continues - an unexpected party'

The metal chest contained nothing but love letters. What a disappointment. I didn't have anything better to do so I went through them with a glass of my own brew which I had named 'Scirum'.

Apparently Ozymandias had been writing love letters to Swedishfish. But they all had returned to him unopened. They were not unopened anymore of course. I was getting quite into it.

Apparently Ozymandias had been in love with Swedishfish since he was 6. That was when she had asked him in kindergarten if she could use his crayons. She never returned the crayons. She had used them all to make subversive posters with catchy titles such as: 'death to all proletarian treachers', 'capatalist pigs will die!', and 'kindergarten is hell'.

The teacher had accused her of making the posters but little 6 year old Ozymandias had jumped in and claimed that he had made them. She didn't even give him a glance of approval but retreated to the toilets to make more pamflets and revolutionary material.

Ozymandias' heart was broken, but could not help loving her.

He continued to follow her around whenever possible but she never acknowledged him. As a teenager Ozymandias decided to make the big step for her. He became a communist. He started writing her the very first letters explaining that he just had become a communist for her!

She never replied, but found a note on his door the next day covered in blood stating: TRAITOR TO OUR CAUSE.

Ozymandias' heart was broken again. Again the girl he loved wouldn't ackowledge his sacrifice. He had denounced his family to become a communist. He had read all the works of Karl Marx. He has bought a red flag and everything. What more could he do to win her heart over? Apparently she was not a communist, but part of some other revolutionary splinter group.

I stopped reading, although it was all very fascinating. I was getting a bit hungry. Thankfully Cosmictraveller had filled the storage bins with fresh food. I had taken a bag of it with me when I left the village. I wish he would grow something else besides potatoes and cucumbers. I made a mental note to tell him that when I would see him.

ScRaMbLe was calling. He had come to visit me. Normally I would have run away but I had already had a few Scirums. I offered ScRaMbLe one which he eagerly took. He told me it was a whole lot of better shit than you could get down at the bar. I guess he would come to visit me now more often. I was not sure if I was completely happy about that, but the Scirum was still in my blood and I started singing. That scared ScRaMbLe a bit and he filled his cup again with scirum slamming it back. He now started singing too, although much better then me.

He told me about the toilet incident. I learned now for the very first time that someone actually had tried to kill me with a bomb. I wasn't really bothered by it though, since the scirum was flowing freely now. RebelWithoutACow was a true professional drunk. He had heard the singing of drunken people all the way back in the village (I doubt that anyone else could have recognized the significance of these strange sounds) and had hurried to get here. We invited him and supplied him with copious amounts of scirum.

It was turning into a proper party.
 
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I had a rather hard time this morning getting all the fresh eggs from the chickens they were in a "fowl' mood. The slaughter of the pigs and a steer went just fine so I will replenish the towns meat supply today. The fresh garden veggies are almost ready to harvest and by this time tomorrow I'll pick them and send them on into town.

The aquaculture farming is doing damn good it seems and my extra lobsters that I didn't sell outside of town will be given to those who would like some fresh lobsters probably on friday if they want to stop by. I guess there will be some who want them and I'll be happy to fill the bill.
 
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SCIVILLAGE
report by: Outcast- spuriousmonkey
Day 5 - 'addendum'

ScRaMbLe explained to me that I should look further than just the first two baskets for food. There are more food items than just potatoes and cucumbers to be found.

I felt stupid, but that feeling disappeared after another glas of scirum and a handful of fatty scivillage fries.
 
Animal:Tiger, Kunax
Day 5: A Friend

Retured home after visiting a village further down the river. I had found a friend down there, one of those humans with feathers on his head. We played catch for a while, until he just stopped moving, perhaps he was tired. After trying to wake him by pushing him around, I got bored and moved on.

Later the villagers had found the sleeping chieftain and carried him of to there village, shortly there after they had returned with those pointy sticks of theres, and was now running around all over the place, that was when i began heading home.

Day 5: Back Home
Reaching home i was getting quite hungry, i remembed smelling food in the village so i made my way to the village.
Getting into the village was no problem as there was no one around, in the distance i could hear the dead cries of some strange beast, soon a second beast joined in, I wonder what beast would scream like that, but soon forgot it again as I found the storage bins, now all i had to do was get them open, pushing them over seem to do the trick.

On my way out of the village i got curious about what was in side those little huts the villages was living in, as i approach a hut on the very edge of the village, I found the door open.
Inside everything was nice and clean, except for a dented box, and some buckets and barrels connected by pipes in the middle of the hut. This would make a good hideout was it not for the human taint.

Being thirsty after eating i drank some the water in one of the buckets, it had a strange taste and smell and made me feel all warm inside, i figured it was just my winter coat, so i drank some more, soon the bucket was empty. I was feeling strange, as i made my way for the door, but getting there was not easy, the door kept moving, and why did i keep tripping over my self.
Finally I made it to the door, as i stood there resting for a minute, i noised the terrible sounds i heard earlier approach, deciding to hid I drunkenly turn around and ran back in to the hut, but in my haste to find a place to hid, I got entangle in the bed covers. Figuring i had successfully hid my self i passed out on the bed, only tail sticking out.
 
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SCIVILLAGE
report by: Outcast- spuriousmonkey
Night 5 - 'sleep'

It was a great party...we sang all night and finished my first batch of scirum. Well, I still had a bucket full of it left in my hut, but that was for emergencies.

I went inside and stumbled to my bed. Somehow it was warm and cosy inside my bed. Usually it was quite chilly, but not today. I imagined it was the scirum.

I fell asleep immediately....
 

Animal:Tiger, Kunax
Night 5: so sleepy


I woke in the middle of the night, someone was using my new hidding place, better show who's boss here I thougth in my clouded mind, as i but a paw across his chest and fell asleep again.
 
Day??????
Today I opened up another barber shop. w00t. That is about it i guess. Oh look a metal chest.......
 
Night 5 - Drunken monkey fist

It didn't take me long to locate Spurious monkey. When I first met him it was difficult to hide a smirk... He was the guy I had seen running through the village a few days earlier with his pants around his ankles! Trying not to laugh I introduced myself and began to explain what I had heard. He offered me a drink of some of his home brew he called "scirum". It was good. We continued drinking for a few hours and as we talked the pieces of the puzzle began to fit together. I began to think, despite being obviously unstable, this man could be trusted and probably a useful ally.

Then he started to sing.

I really didn't know what to make of it all, but since I knew the song I joined in. Before long several others arrived and got stuck into the scirum as well. It had turned into quite a party! We sang and drank into the night. Eventually, after most of the drinks were gone, the other guests made their way home.

It was then that the evening took an interesting twist. Perhaps it was the excessive alcohol, but Spurious began to let his guard down a little. He started telling me about his past. It was an interesting story about how he had been trained to fight, by a drunken master, long ago. He said the fighting style was called "drunken monkey fist" and he began to show me some moves. It became apparent that I had misjudged this man. Even in a drunken state he was obviously a force to be reckoned with. A powerful ally indeed. He agreed to teach me this "drunken monkey fist" style in exchange for a favour. He needed someone to transport and sell his scirum to nearby villages. I couldn't believe my luck! We struck a deal and then he said it was time for me to go. I thanked him for the drinks and began to make my way home. I doubted that he would even remember the conversation in the morning...

I stumbled around for about an hour outside and had made it about halfway home when I realised I had left my sword at Spurious' hut. Dammit! now I would have to go all the way back. I crept into the hut, so as not to wake him and grabbed my sword. It was then that I noticed the tiger. This man had a full grown tiger asleep next to him in the same bed! It was the same tiger that had ambushed me earlier that day, I was sure of it!

My head was reeling... What was going on? Who was this man that can tame wild beasts? Did he send the tiger to ambush me earlier that day? I didn't understand, but even in my drunken state, I decided that if he had wanted to harm me, he could have, so perhaps it was just best to leave sleeping cats lie. I would confront him tomorrow...
 
SCIVILLAGE
report by: Outcast- spuriousmonkey
Day 6 - 'A new beginning'

It was already quite late when I woke up. By the looks of the sun it must already be around noon. I had quite strange dreams. I dreamt that tiger was holding me trying to crush my skull with his gigantic mouth filled with pointy teeth. I sat up in my bed and studied my blankets. That was weird. There were hairs all over my bed; orange hairs, black hairs and white hairs.

No point in worrying about these things. I had more important things to do. I was clean out of 'scirum'. I had to get the next batch going. I decided to make more than last time. A man without a drink is like a man running around with his pants around his ankles?or worse.

I couldn't remember much from last night, but I felt I had given away too much from my past. I should never have told ScRaMbLe about my knowledge in 'drunken monkey fist' martial arts. I was definitely hoping I didn't tell the full story!

I was wondering if the tiger was still rummaging around in the forest. I started thinking about this tiger a lot lately. It didn't really seem to be that evil. No, it seemed more curious than anything else. Still, better not to get to close to it. It might just have stepped out of bed with the wrong paw on the very day that I try to get friendly with it. No sir, better let other people stick their necks out. I decided though not to worry about the tiger too much. Whatever would happen would happen anyway. Nothing I could do about it.

I ran quickly to the village and got some other food than just potatoes and cucumbers. Once back I made myself lunch and started reading the love letters from Ozymandias to SwedishFish.

'love story of Ozymandias and SwedishFish - part 2'
Ozymandias was desperate. He begged SwedishFish to acknowledge him, to acknowledge the mere fact that he was alive. That was all he wanted (yeah right I thought reading that. He wants more than that!). But no, SwedishFish still didn't reply to any of his letters. Ozymandias was beyond desperate now. He decided to get married with a girl from the other village. She had been in love with him for several years. Her father was a rich man and leader of the other village. He disapproved of the marriage, but his daughter begged him incessantly until he caved in. Ozymandias was not stupid though. He demanded half the property of her father before he would marry her. Her father did so because he loved his daughter very much (Ozymandias made a note here saying that he believed that the love of this father for his daughter was 'unnatural'. I am not sure what he meant by this).
They got married in the other village. Ozymandias demanded that they would move to Scivillage. That broke her father's heart. He died soon after. Now everything belonged to Ozymandias. The strange thing was that he didn't want all these riches and properties. He was a communist after all. He gave everything to the scivillage community. He build for instance the public toilets with it (sorry Ozymandias for the mess I made in the toilets. I didn't know about your generous gift. I will flush the next time).

Still, SwedishFish was not impressed and didn't show any interest in Ozymandias since he got married. Ozymandias had hoped that SwedishFish would have gotten jealous. He had hoped that she would have come to the wedding and stopped it. That she would have begged him at that moment to take her instead of that silly cow.

Their marriage was a failure to start with. Ozymandias never even touched his wife. He was obsessed with SwedishFish. Soon his wife asked him for a divorce. He didn't even look up and signed the papers. He left her with enough money to last her a lifetime and started working vigorously on communist essays. Everything to get his mind of SwedishFish.

Meanwhile SwedishFish was seen more and more in the presence of Persol, the explorer. Persol treated SwedishFish like shit. He knew she was in love with him and he couldn't care less about her. Ozymandias was going mad. He left the village for 3 years. He kept writing SwedishFish but the tone of the letters had changed. They were not longer full of life, but were filled with sadness.

After 3 years he returned to find SwedishFish alone again. She had lost her interest in Persol. She still didn't acknowledge Ozymandias though. Ozymandias' heart broke again in one thousand pieces.



Reading makes me thirsty. My new brew was still not ready though. I went down to the village. The people in the village were looking strange at me and were whispering things to each other. I caught a few words; 'tiger', 'sleep', 'devil', 'I hear scirum is good'.
 
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When I was walking in the village saw something that amazed me. Kunax the tiger is right there. What should I do, what should I do. A weapon in hand I slowly come up to him and.........
 
Thank goodness I live far away from town that tigers don't come my way for it surly would be taken care of here on the farm. I finally am going to get my photovoltaic system up and running today to convert water into hydrogen so I don't have to pay those enormous gas and fuel bills any longer. I've been holding off finishing it because of the harvesting for the good townspeople so they will have plent to eat.

It is very dark out here at night and I use my telescope to view the cosmos. Last evening I saw a few metorites entering Earths atmosphere and burning up. When I gazed away I saw some fireflies flitting about turning themselves off and on , almost trying to communicate with those meterorites. Amazing what nature has to offer and not having a TV it is a much better way to enjoy life.
 
Animal:Tiger, Kunax
Day 6: Rise and shine

Woke by a door being slammed, where was I, the day before was a blur, i could not remember much of it.
Suddenly remembering where i was, I sprang up, causing my head to hurt and the world around me started spinning, still engangled in the sheet i took a step and dropped out off the bed, landing on the floor with a big thump.
The sheet was still coving my head, I tried to shake it of, but that only made my head hurt, luckily after walking around bumping into a few things here and there the sheet came off and i made a run for the door but had to stop and rest in the door way do to the headaches.

Outside the sun was shining brighter then ever, i had to almost close my eyes as i made my way around the hut, i could see the forest now, only a small fence was in my way, that was quickly scaled with a less then dignifying jump that ended in a crash landing.
 
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I got drunk of scirum. I tripped over the metal chest I found. Also my wife caught me flirting with another women, while I was drunk and I hope we can work it out. Other then that, have a great day people and don't forget to get your haircut, by the Cert himself.*trips over the metal chest again.
 
SCIVILLAGE
report by: Outcast- spuriousmonkey
Day 6 - 'A haircut'

I decided that while I was in the village anyway I should get a haircut.

I recognized the barber from the party. His hands were still shaking.

uh...the results were...uh....
 
the results were that you had the finest haircut I have ever done. On a side note, my hands were shaking because I was afraid that my wife would leave me.
 
SCIVILLAGE
report by: Outcast- spuriousmonkey
Day 6 - 'A haircut'

It was the finest work he had ever done. But everything is always relative...
 
(funky website you have swedish :) )
 
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