Sciforums Quotes Thread

Malakas said:
How about getting reacquainted with your vibrator?
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Nikelodeon said:
Its too limp at the moment.
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Malakas said:
Rub it, silly.
Lick it a bit.
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Nikelodeon said:
Lick it??! Fuck me if I could do that I wouldnt need hookers any more.
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Malakas said:
Where do you find male hookers these days?
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Nikelodeon said:
VD clinics.
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Nikcelodoen being all hard and witty. Or limp and witty. In his usual crude, simplistic way, of course.

The exchange halted when Nikcldenoeo remembered that he works for the French, and lapsed into appropriate silence.
 
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Roman said:
Sort of.

0005yrd9
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source: http://www.sciforums.com/showthread.php?p=1840007#post1840007
 
File under W for "Huh?"

Draqon said:

Rap is above all music, it is the essence of the frequency of our DNA.

(#1844761/22)
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I must admit, it would probably be loads of fun to smoke Draqon into the ground.

:m:
 
Making Love

Sciforum's very own sexpert:

darksidZz said:
Making luV is the mating of the female with the male. They become one and so get very sexually excited. This occurs when male has things to offer female for purposes of pleasure (outside mating). As time passes as long as said male keeps / maintains sources of pleasure for said female she will continue mating. To her mating is secondary but the other pleasures primary. How many females would leave their men if they found themselves broke or without actual riches? Many I suspect..
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This is going to require some explanation

Can I include one from the Encyclopedia?

Oh, hell, I'm going to, anyway:

Spuriousmonkey said:

Football is a game involving feet and a ball. Americans call it soccer and try to pretend that it doesn't exist. 2 billion people worldwide tend to disagree. But then what can you expect of a country that holds a Baseball World Series that only Americans are allowed to participate in?

([enc]Football[/enc])
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Now, some of you might wonder what makes this such a spectacular quote.

Well, in the first place, apparently Canada is part of the United States. The Toronto Blue Jays won the World Series in 1992, becoming the first Canadian team to take the title. The following season, the Jays became the first team in fifteen years to win back-to-back Series titles.

Also, it's worth noting that our departed friend posted the line in March, 2007. This came several months after the National Foundation for American Policy issued a report on foreign-born baseball players in the Major League. According to the press release, "New Report Finds Foreign-Born Baseball Players Making Key Impact on Game; Proportion Highest in Major League History":

• Season Stats: Seven of the nine best batting averages in the American League in 2006 were foreign-born, as were the home run leader and two top RBI hitters. In the National League, two of the top three batting averages were by foreign-born hitters; same with home runs. A foreign-born pitcher led the majors in strikeouts and ERA; two foreign-born pitchers tied for most wins during the regular season.

• All Star Game: 31% of the players selected for the 2006 All Star Game were foreign-born; 44% of the starters for the game (7 of 16°) were foreign-born.

• Rosters: 23% of major league players on active rosters in 2006 were foreign-born, the highest proportion in league history. That proportion does not include the 40 foreign-born players on the disabled list at the end of August.

• Rosters (count): Dominican Republic (81), Venezuela (45), Mexico (10), Canada (10), Japan (8), Panama (6), Cuba (4), South Korea (3), Colombia (2), Taiwan (2).

• The recent lack of H-2B visas (used for tech industry workers) has prevented hundreds of foreign-born players from playing in the minor leagues. (The minors are a route to the major leagues; players are regularly "called up" to fill roster openings.)​

Also: the St. Louis Cardinals won the 2006 World Series; their roster included at least eight foreign-born players throughout the season including Albert Pujols, who led the majors in slugging percentage while hitting 49 home runs and 137 RBIs to place second in both categories. He placed second in voting for National League MVP; he won the award the prior season, edging out Andruw Jones, who was born in the Netherlands Antilles. (Jones, for the record, has made the All Star Game five times and won ten Gold Glove awards for his defensive play. He also broke Mickey Mantle's record as the youngest player to hit a home run in the World Series ... on Mantle's birthday.)

The 2007 World Series champions, the Boston Red Sox, brought nine foreign-born players on their starting roster.

At any rate, that's what makes the quote hilarious. Major League Baseball would suck without our foreign players.
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Notes:

National Foundation for American Policy. "New Report Finds Foreign-Born Baseball Players Making Key Impact on Game; Proportion Highest in Major League History". October 20, 2006. http://www.nfap.com/researchactivities/studies/baseballstudy102006.pdf
 
Lately there are quite a few that have given me a chuckle.


Dr Lou Natic said:
Which lumps make you wanna grit your teeth and squeeze 'em? If the answer to that is eyes you're not some super gentlemen, you're actually a perverted freak and possibly a murderer, so choose wisely.
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Betrayer0fHope said:
How did Lou even remember I was Indian? :\
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LOL....

Dr Lou Natic said:
This is a trick question, he's not mentioning the fact he has brown skin.
Classic little bait and switch move.
He's like "Should I be able to vote? *restrained chuckling*" and everyone's like "sure, why not?" and then he's like "haha I'm an indian (or paki or something)", but it's too late because you already voted on the poll. I'm not falling for it.
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