Norrisism - The newest religion

[nds1]

Who is with me?

The new religion is called Norrisism.

Here are some general guidelines:

The scripture is "Force of One", any other Norris movie, and all Walker Texas Ranger episodes. Norris's word is law.

Every day you must turn to the east and perform 10 roundhouse kicks with your foot reaching face height. For what is a roundhouse kick which cannot land on the face?

Every morning upon wakening you must recite at least 10 Chuck Norris jokes out loud. Anything less than ten and you are at risk for a spiritual roundhouse special to the jaw.

You must have a rugged beard at all times and it must be impenetrable.

Any other guidelines to suggest or comments?

 

[Prince_James]

Norris surely knows the answer to the Riddle of Steel, but Crom is the only God.

 

[Michael]

Walker Texas Ranger episodes

Sorry mate but the acting in those series was shit. I couldn't even sit through one episode. They were almost as bad as V.I.P. the TV series..


Anyway, there's already a perfectly reasonable movie-inspired religion.

The Jediism Way

 

[Michael]

From WIKI:

Crom is a grim and gloomy god, ever watching from atop his mountain in dark clouds and obscuring mists, ready to pass a disapproving judgment on any and all, but he is said to approve of courage and tenacity, even if the human is too frail to succeed. He is not so much worshipped as invoked as a swearword or when trying to gather one's courage. Not that he ever does anything, good or bad, to mortals. It is said that his sole gift to men is to bestow them at birth with the courage to go on, survive, and vanquish adversity.

Crom seems OK...too

 

[MetaKron]

Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

 

[mustafhakofi]

and I use chunk norris bog paper, that's about his worth.

 

[nds1]

and I use chunk norris bog paper, that's about his worth.

Have fun in the "Lake of Norris."

 

[Nickelodeon]

chunk norris is a wimp.

 

[nds1]

Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

Filming on location for Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris brought a stillborn baby lamb back to life by giving it a prolonged beard rub. Shortly after the farm animal sprang back to life and a crowd had gathered, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the animal, breaking its neck, to remind the crew once more that Chuck giveth, and the good Chuck, he taketh away.

 

[nds1]

chunk norris is a wimp.

Good job, I hope your happy that your name has been erased from the Book of Norris