Monkeys Mentally Controlling Robotic Arm

Monkeys can now throw poo 872% farther due to the help of cybernetics. THis is like those scientists inventing rocket propelled cockroaches.
 
Cool, i wonder how long it will take till we'll be able to comunicate via electronic telepathy?
 
They really did put tiny rockets on roaches to examine how they ambulate at high speeds. (apparently they are amazingly stable) I swear to god.
 
"But before long, the scientists said, they will upgrade the implants so the monkeys can transmit their mental commands to machines wirelessly"

That quote from the article gave me some uncomfortable, yet hilarious images of people tapping into this wireless connection and taking control of poor robotic monkey arms.

I'm glad they've progressed on somewhat truer thought control though. Oppose to all the other research that tries to sell the same bit when its really just an eeg hooked up to a computer that monitors when a brain wave is in some pre designated regions...and then sets it up to activate something..like a lightbulb turning on when its high and off when its low..like a futuristic clapper.
 
You must consider the possibility:

The researchers are actually working for the American military; and some spy revealed the secret. The US was planning to use technologically enhanced monkeys to infiltrate terrorist bases and pretend they belong there. From there the monkey agents would send back video telemetry revealing valuable intelligence required to defeat the war against terrorism.

Hey, at least they are developing a new, bolder weapon! Finally, a new way to fight against terrorism!
 
Clockwood and spuriousmonkey:
roach.jpg


Alien Mastermind,

Actually I heard they doign that with rats.
http://www.bu.edu/bridge/archive/2002/05-16/in-the-news.html
Medical researchers who have successfully implanted electrodes in the brains of laboratory rats and used them like remote-controlled robots have attracted attention both from the medical community -- for the potential of restoring muscle control in paralyzed humans -- and from the Pentagon, reports the May 2 San Francisco Chronicle. The Pentagon supports efforts to learn whether the rats, by carrying tiny video cameras on their backs, can be used to sniff out hidden explosives, as mine detectors, or even to aid in search-and-rescue operations. Although military use is not what their experiments started out for, the research team from the State University of New York's Downstate Medical Center says that the Pentagon become interested and now is one of the project's funders. Howard Eichenbaum, a CAS professor of psychology, says, "Using a rat would certainly be a dirt-cheap way to find an enemy hidden in a cave, or sniff out a body in a ruin, and you could never get a million-dollar robot to do it. It's a challenging idea."
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