'Intelligent Falling' :)

M

Michael

歌舞伎
Valued Senior Member
Just something fun for the weekend,

Evangelical Scientists Refute Gravity With New 'Intelligent Falling' Theory
KANSAS CITY, KS—As the debate over the teaching of evolution in public schools continues, a new controversy over the science curriculum arose Monday in this embattled Midwestern state. Scientists from the Evangelical Center For Faith-Based Reasoning are now asserting that the long-held "theory of gravity" is flawed, and they have responded to it with a new theory of Intelligent Falling.

"Things fall not because they are acted upon by some gravitational force, but because a higher intelligence, 'God' if you will, is pushing them down," said Gabriel Burdett, who holds degrees in education, applied Scripture, and physics from Oral Roberts University.

Burdett added: "Gravity—which is taught to our children as a law—is founded on great gaps in understanding. The laws predict the mutual force between all bodies of mass, but they cannot explain that force. Isaac Newton himself said, 'I suspect that my theories may all depend upon a force for which philosophers have searched all of nature in vain.' Of course, he is alluding to a higher power."

continued from link.

Michael
 
LOL - it's a good joke. All the more so because this is the type of thing such fundamantalist religionists might say.
 
ah, true satire. usually the Onion fails at that, in my experience.

this is exactly what Intelligent Design proponents are basically saying. 'the universe is complex and we may never find what caused it. but we already know: that cause is called God.' Swap 'the universe' with 'gravity', or 'inertia', and there you have it. all that they are saying, is that things are complex and that we should blame that complexity on an invisible beard in the sky.
 
By calling it 'intelligent falling' were those physicists(even that doesn't sound right) referring to themselves?
 
Gee, is my face red. Its getting so I'll believe anything zany and relating to Christians. I can see a whole religion starting from something similar.
 
i can't entirely blame you, actually. it's exactly what intelligent design proponents seem to be saying, only taken to the level where the absurdity is quite readily apparent.
 
Huh. Honestly thought this was all serious until I bothered to check the link. My reaction was just 'Well, I knew they would do it eventually.'
 
I think the odds are good that one of these Sunday morning tv evangelists will use it. If not it will appear at sometime, somewhere. The scary part is, it'll probably be preached to little kids in Sunday school by some overzealous creationist programmer. Poor little buggers never stood a chance.
 
Michael said:
Just something fun for the weekend,

Evangelical Scientists Refute Gravity With New 'Intelligent Falling' Theory
KANSAS CITY, KS—As the debate over the teaching of evolution in public schools continues, a new controversy over the science curriculum arose Monday in this embattled Midwestern state. Scientists from the Evangelical Center For Faith-Based Reasoning are now asserting that the long-held "theory of gravity" is flawed, and they have responded to it with a new theory of Intelligent Falling.

"Things fall not because they are acted upon by some gravitational force, but because a higher intelligence, 'God' if you will, is pushing them down," said Gabriel Burdett, who holds degrees in education, applied Scripture, and physics from Oral Roberts University.

Burdett added: "Gravity—which is taught to our children as a law—is founded on great gaps in understanding. The laws predict the mutual force between all bodies of mass, but they cannot explain that force. Isaac Newton himself said, 'I suspect that my theories may all depend upon a force for which philosophers have searched all of nature in vain.' Of course, he is alluding to a higher power."

continued from link.

Michael
Click to expand...

There was something similar to this posted in the alt.atheism newsgroup a while back. Intelligent Grappling Theory.


The INTELLIGENT GRAPPLING FAQ.

1. What is Intelligent Grappling (IG?)

Intelligent Grappling is the SCIENTIFIC Theory that Intelligent
and Conscious Agents "push" things together. It is the only coherent
theory that explains why things fall.

From this Thread:
Subject: Intelligent Grappling FAQ (was Re: In the News: 20 changes emphasize gravity as theory)
Newsgroups: talk.origins, alt.atheism, sci.skeptic
Date: 2002-06-15 14:36:34 PST
 
I am a proponent of Intelligent Design. When I read the link, I was thinking "oh crap, are they serious? This is getting to be rediculous."

I am also a proponent of evolutionary theory.

See, the thing is, if the universe is the result of intelligent design, then we, as humans, will be able to talk about it intelligently, to understand it intelligently. Otherwise, it wouldn't be an intelligent design.
 
Oh! well, so now we have nuts claiming "intellegent falling" soon they will get together with the Flat Earth Society And begin to tell us the earth is actually flat by intellegent design.

Godless
 
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