I had a laugh today!

V

visceral_instinct

Monkey see, monkey denigrate
Valued Senior Member
So I was at the market, happily taking a walk around after overindulging in some unnecessary clothes and jewellery...and this old woman comes up to me, out of NOWhere, and insists that I should come to her van and have my palms read.

She first predicts: 'You're going to be rocking the cradle again. You're going to have another child.'

Me: 'I don't have any children.'

She says: 'No no. You're going to be rocking the cradle.'

Me: 'I don't WANT any children!!'

She says 'Oh you're not going to have a baby. But you're going to meet a nice gentleman. He's tall and pretty looking. Come on, let me read your palm.'

Me: 'No thanks. You are starting to freak me out.' *walks off*

So first her oh so sure intuition told her that I had children and was going to have more, then that I didn't have any but was going to have a baby, then that I wouldn't have a baby but would meet a nice gentleman.

Maybe the gods were listening to our conversation, changed my destiny from having a baby to merely meeting a gentleman, and quickly relayed this to her.

I think that has to earn a medal for woo woo ness. She didn't even have good people reading ability for god's sake. If she had looked at me properly for 2 seconds she'd have noticed that I was aged 18-20, too young to likely have a child.

Just thought I'd share this. :D
 
visceral_instinct said:
She didn't even have good people reading ability for god's sake. If she had looked at me properly for 2 seconds she'd have noticed that I was aged 18-20, too young to likely have a child.
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Are you kidding? You should be on your 3rd brown baby by now.
 
Funny thing, VI...I read my own palm this morning. It told me I would be drinking beer tonight and sleeping in late tomorrow.

Betcha I'm psychic. ;)

This is for you VI:

kitty2.jpg
 
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@Anti-Flag: Why a brown baby? Why not an Asian baby, or a white baby?

@MacGyver: What exactly is that pic supposed to mean, or symbolize?
 
Ah, now I get it. I just looked at that pic and realized the cat's front paw being between his hindlegs, actually meant something. That didn't register with me though as that is a pretty normal posture for a cat.
 
Some people fall for it VI. The little old lady probably doesn't want to join a dole queue to get a real job and even if she did, she probably doesn't have any real qualifications or is too old to do anything of any use.

I suppose you could say the self-proclaimed profession is probably the only thing that keeps her out of an old folks home.

Perhaps she just assumed the way you dress or the type of jewellery you wear might of suggested you were a "New Ager" and open to conditioning. (Just remember I don't claim to be psychic, so if you dress all in black and bite the heads off of small children, I'm covered :) )
 
visceral_instinct said:
So I was at the market, happily taking a walk around after overindulging in some unnecessary clothes and jewellery...and this old woman comes up to me, out of NOWhere, and insists that I should come to her van and have my palms read.

She first predicts: 'You're going to be rocking the cradle again. You're going to have another child.'

Me: 'I don't have any children.'

She says: 'No no. You're going to be rocking the cradle.'

Me: 'I don't WANT any children!!'

She says 'Oh you're not going to have a baby. But you're going to meet a nice gentleman. He's tall and pretty looking. Come on, let me read your palm.'

Me: 'No thanks. You are starting to freak me out.' *walks off*

So first her oh so sure intuition told her that I had children and was going to have more, then that I didn't have any but was going to have a baby, then that I wouldn't have a baby but would meet a nice gentleman.

Maybe the gods were listening to our conversation, changed my destiny from having a baby to merely meeting a gentleman, and quickly relayed this to her.

I think that has to earn a medal for woo woo ness. She didn't even have good people reading ability for god's sake. If she had looked at me properly for 2 seconds she'd have noticed that I was aged 18-20, too young to likely have a child.

Just thought I'd share this. :D
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I think it's creepy. Why did she want you to come to her van ?
Perhaps they are robbers.. and this is just a trick to get people into their van.
 
Enmos said:
I think it's creepy. Why did she want you to come to her van ?
Perhaps they are robbers.. and this is just a trick to get people into their van.
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It probably had the whole crystal ball, curtains, tarot cards and incense burners laced with some drug that makes you part with money easier :p
 
visceral_instinct said:
I can afford scrunchies and fancy clothes and other shit, so I guess I count as middle class. Yay :D
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I'm pretty sure almost everyone can.
Can't you just be proud of your working class roots like the rest of us? Ok, ok, i'll compromise, no kids, but you gotta have at least two abortions. ;)
 
Anti-Flag said:
I'm pretty sure almost everyone can.
Can't you just be proud of your working class roots like the rest of us? Ok, ok, i'll compromise, no kids, but you gotta have at least two abortions. ;)
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Ok, two abortions. No problem! Then can I get a puppy?
 
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