I am the son of God, I do not lie.
If you have faith in what I say, you will be granted eternal life in heaven.
If you reject my preaching and believe in false gods such as Jesus Christ, you will be thrown into the Lake of Fire to spend eternity suffering.
I will not die for your sins, because I just plain don't feel like it. Too bad for you, you'd better burn a sacrificial sheep each time a loved one dies, or they're bound to spend eternity in the Lake of Fire!
I have chosen 10 prophets to write small tomes preaching my Word, they are divinely inspired and will post their tomes in this topic.
If you are one of these Prophets, you will know Me in your heart and feel as if you always have. (wink wink)
My first teaching is that Jack Chick is to be sentenced to eternal suffering for being such an ignorant ass by making those little Chick Tracts. ...on second thought, they were pretty entertaining, so I'll send him back to Earth for another life where he can produce more of those funny things, but this time preaching My word in an honest (not stupid) way.
Remember what I have said in this post.
There is evidence that I am indeed the Son of God: this is that I can make prophecies that are all true.
1. You are connected to the Internet the first time this page loads on your computer from a remote location.
2. If you can understand this text, you are a human being.
3. The perfect shape of your body. Notice that the penis is easily inserted into both the anus AND the vagina? Yep, I made that.
If you die and have rejected this, I will fart in your face and say "Depart from me, ye cursed."
Now I will say a short sentence in the UNIVERSAL LANGUAGE that everybody can understand but not speak:
skivvidallynnnyabbag ddeungwal ^gyoppin'djaggolpanncia asãoncianci piccrdrmmndinnnciíddihkddsbvvpa! Skwddyddyskasdd maskddyvwekdyydkdkdd mskdedddekdlykdlk dlkdadjkdkdjkfkdl; lkeqwer, #ghwerrrdwdlfgkdrdfkyrstpididtsdafas! sjdddsdrwenppqsdfs ghdskknsmdiskdsdfsd sdkfsdkfsswerw, sdjsdfs.
If you have faith in what I say, you will be granted eternal life in heaven.
If you reject my preaching and believe in false gods such as Jesus Christ, you will be thrown into the Lake of Fire to spend eternity suffering.
I will not die for your sins, because I just plain don't feel like it. Too bad for you, you'd better burn a sacrificial sheep each time a loved one dies, or they're bound to spend eternity in the Lake of Fire!
I have chosen 10 prophets to write small tomes preaching my Word, they are divinely inspired and will post their tomes in this topic.
If you are one of these Prophets, you will know Me in your heart and feel as if you always have. (wink wink)
My first teaching is that Jack Chick is to be sentenced to eternal suffering for being such an ignorant ass by making those little Chick Tracts. ...on second thought, they were pretty entertaining, so I'll send him back to Earth for another life where he can produce more of those funny things, but this time preaching My word in an honest (not stupid) way.
Remember what I have said in this post.
There is evidence that I am indeed the Son of God: this is that I can make prophecies that are all true.
1. You are connected to the Internet the first time this page loads on your computer from a remote location.
2. If you can understand this text, you are a human being.
3. The perfect shape of your body. Notice that the penis is easily inserted into both the anus AND the vagina? Yep, I made that.
If you die and have rejected this, I will fart in your face and say "Depart from me, ye cursed."
Now I will say a short sentence in the UNIVERSAL LANGUAGE that everybody can understand but not speak:
skivvidallynnnyabbag ddeungwal ^gyoppin'djaggolpanncia asãoncianci piccrdrmmndinnnciíddihkddsbvvpa! Skwddyddyskasdd maskddyvwekdyydkdkdd mskdedddekdlykdlk dlkdadjkdkdjkfkdl; lkeqwer, #ghwerrrdwdlfgkdrdfkyrstpididtsdafas! sjdddsdrwenppqsdfs ghdskknsmdiskdsdfsd sdkfsdkfsswerw, sdjsdfs.
