HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN:
1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry
hamper according to lights and darks.
2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see
your husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental
note must do more sit-ups.
4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth,
long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
5. Wash your hair once with Cucumber and Sage shampoo with
43 added vitamins.
6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
7. Condition your hair with Grapefruit Mint conditioner
enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for fifteen minutes.
8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for ten
minutes until red.
9. Wash entire rest of body with Ginger Nut and Jaffa Cake
body wash.
10. Rinse conditioner off hair (you must make sure that it
has all come off).
11. Shave armpits and legs. Consider shaving bikini area but
decide to get it waxed instead.
12. Scream loudly when your husband flushes the toilet and
you lose the water pressure.
13. Turn off the shower.
14. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold
spots with Tilex.
15. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small
country. Wrap hair in super absorbent second towel.
16. Check entire body for the remotest sign of a zit, tweeze
hairs.
17. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel
on head.
18. If you see your husband along the way, cover up any
exposed areas.
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and
leave them in a pile.
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see your wife along
the way, shake wiener at her making the "woo woo" sound.
3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror and suck in
your gut to see if you have pecs (no). Admire the size of
your wiener in the mirror and scratch your ass.
4. Get in the shower.
5. Don't bother to look for a washcloth (you don't use one).
6. Wash your face with soapy hands.
7. Wash your armpits with soapy hands.
8. Blow your nose in your hands, then let the water just
rinse it off.
9. Crack up at how loud your fart sounds in the shower.
10. Majority of time is spent washing your privates and
surrounding areas...with soapy hands.
11. Wash your butt leaving those coarse butt hairs on the
soap bar.
12. Shampoo your hair with bath soap (do not use
conditioner).
13. Make a shampoo Mohawk.
14. Peek out of shower curtain to look at yourself in the
mirror again.
15. Pee (in the shower).
16. Rinse off and get out of the shower. Fail to notice
water on the floor because you left the curtain hanging out
of the tub the whole time.
17. Partially dry off.
18. Look at yourself in the mirror, flex muscles, admire
wiener size again.
19. Leave shower curtain open and wet bath mat on the floor.
20. Leave bathroom fan and light on.
21. Return to the bedroom with towel around your waist. If
you pass your wife, pull off the towel, shake wiener at her,
and make the "woo woo" sound again.
22. Throw wet towel on the bed.
hamper according to lights and darks.
1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry
hamper according to lights and darks.
2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see
your husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental
note must do more sit-ups.
4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth,
long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
5. Wash your hair once with Cucumber and Sage shampoo with
43 added vitamins.
6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
7. Condition your hair with Grapefruit Mint conditioner
enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for fifteen minutes.
8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for ten
minutes until red.
9. Wash entire rest of body with Ginger Nut and Jaffa Cake
body wash.
10. Rinse conditioner off hair (you must make sure that it
has all come off).
11. Shave armpits and legs. Consider shaving bikini area but
decide to get it waxed instead.
12. Scream loudly when your husband flushes the toilet and
you lose the water pressure.
13. Turn off the shower.
14. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold
spots with Tilex.
15. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small
country. Wrap hair in super absorbent second towel.
16. Check entire body for the remotest sign of a zit, tweeze
hairs.
17. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel
on head.
18. If you see your husband along the way, cover up any
exposed areas.
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and
leave them in a pile.
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see your wife along
the way, shake wiener at her making the "woo woo" sound.
3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror and suck in
your gut to see if you have pecs (no). Admire the size of
your wiener in the mirror and scratch your ass.
4. Get in the shower.
5. Don't bother to look for a washcloth (you don't use one).
6. Wash your face with soapy hands.
7. Wash your armpits with soapy hands.
8. Blow your nose in your hands, then let the water just
rinse it off.
9. Crack up at how loud your fart sounds in the shower.
10. Majority of time is spent washing your privates and
surrounding areas...with soapy hands.
11. Wash your butt leaving those coarse butt hairs on the
soap bar.
12. Shampoo your hair with bath soap (do not use
conditioner).
13. Make a shampoo Mohawk.
14. Peek out of shower curtain to look at yourself in the
mirror again.
15. Pee (in the shower).
16. Rinse off and get out of the shower. Fail to notice
water on the floor because you left the curtain hanging out
of the tub the whole time.
17. Partially dry off.
18. Look at yourself in the mirror, flex muscles, admire
wiener size again.
19. Leave shower curtain open and wet bath mat on the floor.
20. Leave bathroom fan and light on.
21. Return to the bedroom with towel around your waist. If
you pass your wife, pull off the towel, shake wiener at her,
and make the "woo woo" sound again.
22. Throw wet towel on the bed.
hamper according to lights and darks.
I got this in an email and thought it was quite amusing
