empathy for Atheists or The world's worst sales campaigns

M

Mr. Hamtastic

whackawhackado!
Registered Senior Member
I just have to say, I have alot of empathy for atheists. There you are, minding your own business, along comes Joe Dipshit who exclaims,"Brother! Let me share with you the Good News!"-Maybe I've won the lottery the atheist thinks,"What is this Good News?" "Well, brother let me first say that God LOVES YOU!" "I don't believe in God." "YOU DON'T!? You are bound for Hellfire and damnation!" "No I'm not, I don't believe in hell. Look is this going to take much longer?" "What is time where your soul is at stake?" "I have no soul. Now go away." A few minutes later Bob Crapsalot comes along,"Have you heard the good news?"... hilarity ensues

Anyway. That's got to suck. As a christian I must admit complete and utter embarassment at some of my fellow christians. Some of the worst that I've heard have been:

If you want to go to heaven...

You can avoid hell if...

Isn't nature beautiful, doesn't it make you want to worship its creator?

or my personal favorite: Don't you want to be a part of something bigger than yourself?

If you've heard any silliness like this, post it here for the entertainment of all.
 
I think the most common one I get is from the "Watchtower" people:
Are you annoyed that politicians lie?
Are you getting worried about increasing crime?
Fear not, it was all predicted and the Lord will save you...
 
Oli-JW's are bothersome. They come to my house and want to come in. I tell them we're all nudists and that to come in they'll have to leave their clothes at the door

SAM-a good example of evangelism, dontcha think?
 
Oli-JW's are bothersome. They come to my house and want to come in. I tell them we're all nudists and that to come in they'll have to leave their clothes at the door
Click to expand...

where do you live?
 
why are you a JW? or a nudist? a combination of the two? Just for you I'll hang a sign warning of yellow fever on my door.:)
 
Mr. Hamtastic said:
I just have to say, I have alot of empathy for atheists. There you are, minding your own business, along comes Joe Dipshit who exclaims,"Brother! Let me share with you the Good News!"-Maybe I've won the lottery the atheist thinks,"What is this Good News?" "Well, brother let me first say that God LOVES YOU!" "I don't believe in God." "YOU DON'T!? You are bound for Hellfire and damnation!" "No I'm not, I don't believe in hell. Look is this going to take much longer?" "What is time where your soul is at stake?" "I have no soul. Now go away." A few minutes later Bob Crapsalot comes along,"Have you heard the good news?"... hilarity ensues

Anyway. That's got to suck. As a christian I must admit complete and utter embarassment at some of my fellow christians. Some of the worst that I've heard have been:

If you want to go to heaven...

You can avoid hell if...

Isn't nature beautiful, doesn't it make you want to worship its creator?

or my personal favorite: Don't you want to be a part of something bigger than yourself?

If you've heard any silliness like this, post it here for the entertainment of all.
Click to expand...
oh common have some fun with the silly fucks

http://www.paganlibrary.com/fundies/test_those_christians.php
 
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