dream symbolism

[birch]

do you understand your dreams? sometimes they are just random nothings and sometimes they can be full of symbolism which relate to your life.


once i had a very long and detailed dream. this doesn't happen often though. it's the kind of dream where you think about it when you wake up and reflect on it. dreams often don't make sense literally but they make sense for the purpose of the meaning.

the dream started out with my boyfriend sneaking money from our account little by little to stash away. he and his friend would hang out together a lot and i didn't know what was going on leaving me alone for long periods of time.

one day i decided to follow him and came upon a high-class brothel, if you will. i ended up somehow finding the girl who he had a date/appointment with and as she was getting ready/spiffied up, she and i talked.

she was friendly and neutral to me as she related that she liked my boyfriend because he wined and dined her and made her feel special and dignified and treated her with respect besides the fact he is good-looking. she told me he even brought her a dozen roses each and every time, rented a limousine for them, took her to the fanciest restaurants and would book a room in an upscale/fancy hotel. this was par for the course for a high-class prostitute but as she has different customers not all of them would bring her roses or add that type of touch.

she had a bit of high-energy and i could tell that she was an intelligent girl, she even corrected me in the conversation about some issue but good-naturedly. she was very digital and logical like my boyfriend in some way. she probably was in college. i also could tell she was also naturally sexual or horny as she talked or joked about sexual things within the conversation even telling me what i should do with him or thinking she is giving me pointers. she was platinum blonde and rather petite/thin and wore a floor length shiny metallic dress with matching high-heels. very classy but still trendy. my boyfriend likes petite women as he feels like a protector and he is rather tall. she was a strong or mischievous persona with an added touch of femininity which made me see why my boyfriend would have picked her as well as her sexual prowess. during this time i knew that he was getting ready as well by putting on his tux that he rented and brought with him. when they convened in the hall to go, i hid behind the door to peek. i somehow knew she wasn't going to tell him i was there as she didn't care anyways. i felt sorry for her for living that type of life and wondered what led her there and she had compassion for me because of my boyfriend. she was kind of motherly to me.

i somehow followed them down a back stairwell where the limousine was waiting for them outside. i saw the dozen roses and him wearing his tux with her in hand. they really looked almost like a real happy couple for a night on the town. this hurt my feelings.

this was my chance to confront him so i followed them down and he saw me but didn't say a word as if i wasn't there with a bit of look of resolve on his face and i just watched him too. he held the door for her and closed it without a word and they were off. now he knew i knew and that is what i wanted at least.

i went home pondering a bit about what i should do and different options. he did not show up for a couple of days. i did put two and two together that his friend was the one taking him there or introduced him to it somehow.

when he finally came home, i confronted him. i asked him why he never does those things for me. he never brings me a dozen roses randomly or wears a tux or takes me to a fancy french restaurant. like he always does, when he is dissapointed he never looks you in the eye. he told me that i never dress up, wear makeup or keep up with my looks and i am not interested in sex. he told me he likes the way she responds and they 'click', so to speak.

i asked him if he wanted us to go our separate ways and at first he said no but wouldn't look me in the eye still. i don't know if it was guilt or that he felt sorry for me or that he did love me but i wasn't meeting his dreams or needs. he eventually left and he left the house to me. i felt guilty and not up to par which is why he left. i started to do strange things like paint one side of my face a certain color and act like a child, maybe to get attention. people around me would stare but i wouldn't react.

this is when i woke up and it was so fresh in my memory and had pulled at my heart that i ruminated on it.

i told my boyfriend about this dream that morning. he looked down at his lap and cried. i asked him what he thought of it and he said that he thought it was evil. i asked him if there is anything at all like him in this dream and he told me with tears in his eyes that he would never do something like that to me. it is true that i do have sexual problems but he is sensitive toward me about it and that is not why he is with me.

sometimes reality is the nightmare but in this case where my boyfriend was concerned it was the opposite.

the dream symbolized betrayal in my life as well as the damage resulting from life is why i wasn't up to par. i concentrate on the important things as well as my inner child because that is all that i have left.

 

[Stryder]

I don't read into dream symbolism myself because of the things I've been going through (It's mentioned in other threads, but I don't assume dreams to be a natural occurrence of my own psyche and potentially artificially inserted by a third-party. Which itself sounds completely nuts, but is actually a reality, ever since the dream that ended with Eastern European film credits.), however I wouldn't read too deeply into it or assume it symbolised anything of truth, it could just be a construct to mess with you, don't let it phase you and by all means even if you boyfriend couldn't afford the world for you, I'm sure he knows it's the little things he does that gets your attention.

 

[wellwisher]

In dreams, all the characters in one' dreams are the various parts of that person. We often project characters in our dreams onto others, but they really belong to us. You are the blond escort as well as your boyfriend in that dream.

Your boyfriend in your dream symbolizes your masculine side. You are composed of female and male genes. The female genes are more conscious, but the male genes are not completely dormant, but help to create the masculine side of your personality.

Men and women, in intimate relationships, cross program each other, with your masculine side collecting data from your boyfriend as well as others males within your life. The aspect of your masculine side that appears in your dream is connected to your boyfriend and various cross programming with him and other males.

The blond escort is also part of you. She is the vixen in all women. A women has many faces, although many faces are often repressed. Here blond hair and nice personality is the unconscious mind's way of showing you this part of you is nice.

Your own masculine side is sort of empathizing for your boyfriend (based on data extrapolation), what it thinks he would like. Your masculine side thinks he would like that vixen part of you, who is a nice person as you said in your dream. You don't hate that part of you.

The problem that can occur is, if you assume this dream is ESP and accurately defines your boyfriend (not your masculine side), you may create your own reality, based on your experience.

Instead, maybe role play the dream with your boyfriend. Get a blond wig and have him bring flowers.

 

[birch]

^very spot-on. but as far as the wig and flowers. no..

 

[chimpkin]

The prostitute might symbolize sexual freedom, energy and lack of inhibitions here...and do you maybe not have access to this part of yourself?

Pretty obvious you're afraid that your boyfriend is going to leave you if that part doesn't step forward.
The fun part of healing though...you can't do it for others, on the time-scale of others...but maybe you yourself are ready for this?

Striking that you would paint half your face a different color, as if you felt "split" about something...

(Yes, I know, I will probably need to get a clue somewhere here...)

 

[birch]

yes, this one is very easy to analyze.

let me explain, those are parts of me yet they are not me so to speak. it's kind of like there is you and then there is a room full of different people or sub personalities. i consider them or learn from them in making my decisions but they still aren't me.

also, i am aware that there are some aspects of the escort and the boyfriend that are not like me. this is because as another mentioned, we pick up various programming or influences from others so it's a mixture of myself and other elements or even personas to some extent within those representations. it is just a matter of being able to distinguish it which is usually not that difficult when you cross-reference it with your core self. not all influences are positive or beneficial. you pick and choose it with wisdom.

i could tell a lot of the vixen's traits were lifted from 'sex and the city' type stereotypes or influences of what we think a sexual person is like. i also don't think her personality or even her type of logic is like me either. i think this is also an influence by people in the surroundings. it was an interspersion of me and other characteristics superimposed. i knew right away that how she joked about sex wasn't my style, that is just not like me but her friendliness and compassion toward me was as well as her liking my boyfriend was especially when she described he treated her with respect and saw him as her boyfriend. i also knew she was hiding her pain but you couldn't tell from the persona.

even the boyfriend's flamboyant and materialistic ways are not me, it is lifted from negative past experience with cold or abusive but power-hungry men. as far as her liking him, was the repressed male that is inside that shell who is strong but moral. that is where the real connection was taking place but they are abandoning me or that is the ruse or appearance. stryder may be right in this instance, that the negative programming may be responsible for this dream.