Are there any other single people out there who are getting depressed at this time of the year? I 'm sick and tired of hearing about this is a time for families and children and blah, blah, blah. I live with my dog and have no frigging family.Society refuses to admit that we even exist during these holidays. Do people expect us to crawl into a hole and just stay out of their celebrations? Are we really to be the forgotten minority? I say NO, but I don't know what to do!
Depressed Single People!
- Thread starter shaman1301
- Start date
Depression
For many, this is indeed the most depressing time of the year. Whether one is single, married, surrounded by family and friends, or alone. The reasons are many. But I think a key ingredient is the illusion that everybody else is having fun. Parties, travel, hobbies, sports, etc., when - in fact - reality is quite a different thing. Much of our economy is based on "the good life" - superficial and unattainable - whereas some people enjoy a healthy mindset, and see the illusion for what it is: a sham.
Peace and goodwill.
For many, this is indeed the most depressing time of the year. Whether one is single, married, surrounded by family and friends, or alone. The reasons are many. But I think a key ingredient is the illusion that everybody else is having fun. Parties, travel, hobbies, sports, etc., when - in fact - reality is quite a different thing. Much of our economy is based on "the good life" - superficial and unattainable - whereas some people enjoy a healthy mindset, and see the illusion for what it is: a sham.
Peace and goodwill.
Shaman1301,
Don’t worry about this. Currently 82 million Americans are single, that is about 25% of all Americans.
And 25% of all households consist of a single person living alone.
And 40% of all men in the USA are single.
Mathematically we are a minority, but boy, 82 million is still a big number.
Unfortunately there is a considerable political, legal and religious bias towards normality meaning being part of a family. In recent decades the number of single people has been increasing steadily, and marriage is on the decrease with a 50% divorce rate. And 32% of all children in the USA are now born to unmarried parents.
But TV and advertising tend to stress that families are normal and you need to be part of a couple to enjoy life.
I’m single by choice and have no intention of ever being part of a couple again. I ended an 18 year marriage 10 years ago, and while I initially missed the constant companionship, that soon wore off. The next expectation seemed to be that I should date and find a new partner. Well I did that for a while, and then realized that I actually enjoy the peace, quiet, lack of stress, freedom, running my own life my way without criticism or having to consider the feelings of another of what they might want to do, and never having to compromise, etc etc.
So once I dismissed the perceived pressure to be non-single I found life was significantly less stressful, more productive, and generally more enjoyable.
But if you want to know more or help fight against the discrimination against single people then take a look at the
American Association of Single People (AASP)
Have fun.
Cris
Don’t worry about this. Currently 82 million Americans are single, that is about 25% of all Americans.
And 25% of all households consist of a single person living alone.
And 40% of all men in the USA are single.
Mathematically we are a minority, but boy, 82 million is still a big number.
Unfortunately there is a considerable political, legal and religious bias towards normality meaning being part of a family. In recent decades the number of single people has been increasing steadily, and marriage is on the decrease with a 50% divorce rate. And 32% of all children in the USA are now born to unmarried parents.
But TV and advertising tend to stress that families are normal and you need to be part of a couple to enjoy life.
I’m single by choice and have no intention of ever being part of a couple again. I ended an 18 year marriage 10 years ago, and while I initially missed the constant companionship, that soon wore off. The next expectation seemed to be that I should date and find a new partner. Well I did that for a while, and then realized that I actually enjoy the peace, quiet, lack of stress, freedom, running my own life my way without criticism or having to consider the feelings of another of what they might want to do, and never having to compromise, etc etc.
So once I dismissed the perceived pressure to be non-single I found life was significantly less stressful, more productive, and generally more enjoyable.
But if you want to know more or help fight against the discrimination against single people then take a look at the
American Association of Single People (AASP)
Have fun.
Cris
Mass Media
Yes, it seems the mass media has taken up the cause of promoting(shoving down our throats!) that the traditional family is the only important or "meaningful" lifestyle. In the long run they will regret ignoring the 80 million single people because there are a lot or alternative bucks here!
Thanks for the link Chris.
Yes, it seems the mass media has taken up the cause of promoting(shoving down our throats!) that the traditional family is the only important or "meaningful" lifestyle. In the long run they will regret ignoring the 80 million single people because there are a lot or alternative bucks here!
Thanks for the link Chris.
holy crap
Cris,
Damn, where do you get all this stuff???!!!
Shaman####
Dude, I'm married and had to spend Christmas Eve and Day all alone....married to a pilot (apparently people who can afford a Learjet have the capacity and willingness to change their departure time and destination without notice until after pre-flight and fuel calculations----but that's another story). Being married doesn't exempt you from loneliness and depression. Now if you are an orphan, that I can understand.
Cris,
Damn, where do you get all this stuff???!!!
Shaman####
Dude, I'm married and had to spend Christmas Eve and Day all alone....married to a pilot (apparently people who can afford a Learjet have the capacity and willingness to change their departure time and destination without notice until after pre-flight and fuel calculations----but that's another story). Being married doesn't exempt you from loneliness and depression. Now if you are an orphan, that I can understand.
Countdown!
Only three days of the holiday season left. I can't even find my shrink-must be out partying!
Only three days of the holiday season left. I can't even find my shrink-must be out partying!
I don't mind being single at Christmas....it's a few less dollars spent and a few more dollars saved.
It's Valentine's Day that is truely depressing.
It's Valentine's Day that is truely depressing.
2002
Any idea's for New Years Eve?
Any idea's for New Years Eve?
I have an idea: Times Square
I'm not really depressed, being single and all, seeing as how I am only 14. There are girls at my high school that would ALMOST definitely go out with me, I guess I just haven't gotten the urge to ask any of them out. Plus I'm a chicken
I have asked someone out before-she said yes. We had fun. I did it when I was thirteen. When was the earliest time that any of you asked someone out? Can someone beat my record?
I'm not really depressed, being single and all, seeing as how I am only 14. There are girls at my high school that would ALMOST definitely go out with me, I guess I just haven't gotten the urge to ask any of them out. Plus I'm a chicken
I have asked someone out before-she said yes. We had fun. I did it when I was thirteen. When was the earliest time that any of you asked someone out? Can someone beat my record?
I have an idea: Times Square. 500,000 people were there last year. There's probably plenty of depressed, single people just waiting for another, depressed single person to pick em up.
I'm not really depressed, being single and all, seeing as how I am only 14. There are girls at my high school that would ALMOST definitely go out with me, I guess I just haven't gotten the urge to ask any of them out. Plus I'm a chicken
I have asked someone out before-she said yes. We had fun. I did it when I was thirteen. When was the earliest time that any of you asked someone out? Can someone beat my record?
I'm not really depressed, being single and all, seeing as how I am only 14. There are girls at my high school that would ALMOST definitely go out with me, I guess I just haven't gotten the urge to ask any of them out. Plus I'm a chicken
I have asked someone out before-she said yes. We had fun. I did it when I was thirteen. When was the earliest time that any of you asked someone out? Can someone beat my record?
Pollux V talks about getting up enough nerve to ask a girl out on a date. Funny, this was always easy for me. At age 12, my older sister taught me to dance and for the next five years, I was one of the most popular kids in school, at least among the girls who had to dance with each other since all the boys were too busy horsing around to learn this basic social skill. Thus I pretty well had all the dates I could handle and have never been without a girl/woman to this day. Mind you, in addition to dancing, I learned to LISTEN and discovered that girls were more honest and definitely more interesting than my posturing male friends. I've always felt comfortable with females, whereas I'm not so relaxed with loud-mouthed macho morons. Maybe on the ballfield but nowhere else.
John C.
John C.
Thanks!
To all the posters to this thread thank you and have a Happy New Year! I hope everyone finds what they are looking for in 2002.
To all the posters to this thread thank you and have a Happy New Year! I hope everyone finds what they are looking for in 2002.
scilosopher
Registered Senior Member
Cris,
I'm confused by your stats, if about 25% of all americans are single and 40% of men are single then 20% of the 25% of single people are men. Are there that many more lesbians than gay men? Has polygamy run rampant? Are women moving out of the US? You're making me nervous, I thought I had a bigger pool than that ...
I agree with your points though.
Pollux,
don't miss out on opportunities. It's much harder to meet cool girls once you're out of school. Also the earlier you hone your skills the better, the women generally get less forgiving of bumbling as they get older. Unless you prefer being single. Personally I find it hard to have enough one nighters to stay sated. Also at risk of sounding like a bit of a perv, enjoy the young girls while it's legal ... (though you certainly have plenty of time at 14)
I would also advise against times square - it's cold and you're packed in with 500,000 really drunk people. I don't know of any person who's ever gone and had a really good time. Someone in any group that goes always gets lost.
I'd rather be single than with someone that isn't for me. It's surprising how many people stick with someone they aren't really satisfied with.
I'm confused by your stats, if about 25% of all americans are single and 40% of men are single then 20% of the 25% of single people are men. Are there that many more lesbians than gay men? Has polygamy run rampant? Are women moving out of the US? You're making me nervous, I thought I had a bigger pool than that ...
I agree with your points though.
Pollux,
don't miss out on opportunities. It's much harder to meet cool girls once you're out of school. Also the earlier you hone your skills the better, the women generally get less forgiving of bumbling as they get older. Unless you prefer being single. Personally I find it hard to have enough one nighters to stay sated. Also at risk of sounding like a bit of a perv, enjoy the young girls while it's legal ... (though you certainly have plenty of time at 14)
I would also advise against times square - it's cold and you're packed in with 500,000 really drunk people. I don't know of any person who's ever gone and had a really good time. Someone in any group that goes always gets lost.
I'd rather be single than with someone that isn't for me. It's surprising how many people stick with someone they aren't really satisfied with.
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