Critique My Life

[sderenzi]

I'm interested in a well thought-out, analytical series of suggestions on what my life is an may in the future be. Here's some data to go over, mostly told from personal perspective. Get to work all you thinkers!

I grew up with my parents always fighting over money, most of the time they just faught over anything at all. When I began going to school everything was fun, I did alright for a young kid, had friends, basically was fine. Later on in Junior High things had changed, almost all my friends were gone (because they moved away or merely lost interest) an I found myself alone. We lived in the same area all of our lives so it's not like there was anything new to learn about the social structure surrounding me.

In Junior High I never made 1 friend, mostly I was bullied an treated badly by other students. I tried fitting in but always had different feelings then the other kids about life. No one ever really approached me wanting to play after school, or anything similar. I found myself more alone then ever, this is when my depression set in. For some time after Freshman year in Junior High I suffered sporadic feelings of helplessness, worthlessness, doubt, then fear. Most of the time it related to either home or school. When I finally graduated I thanked god I was free, yet another hell was to begin.

High School was perhaps the worst time for me in my life. It was when I got to see all those around me forming relationships, friendships, an always being the one left out. I really was a nice guy, a good person, but nothing ever happened socially for me. I had a very difficult time looking people in the eyes to the point I walked with my head bowed (until my chiropractor said it was messing my neck up). I tried during this time to leave others alone out of fear they'd tease or make fun of me. I wasn't very bad looking, I think I looked ok. The thing is somehow, someway, people just never saught any contact with me. I was very open an considerate, but I never found anyone that seemed to care.

This lead me to even more depression, then around Junior High I began therapy which didn't really help. High School was a big part of my life, I always knew I'd never get a degree, that I'd end up living at home with a fairly basic job. Even so I wanted to have more in life, I just couldn't find a way of acquiring it.

So there I finally graduate High School and don't even attend the graduation ceremonies. I declined to attend because I had barely passed Senior year an felt ashamed that I should even be seen there. Most of the people in the classes had known of me someway, they all treated me badly or ignored me entirely. The thing is I could hear the ceremonies from my house because I lived that close! I remember thinking how I wish I had friends so that going would really matter.

This leads me to around now. I got out, worked at Turtle Wax awhile, when things got to hard at home I eventually moved out to California to stay with my sister for a few years.. then my depression became even worse (because we lived in a terrible apartment in Korea Town though I'm not Korean) and the lonliness was even more appearant then before. I basically had nothing, no life, just work, eat, work, and it wasn't even that much money!

I came back to live with my parents (at my concern) but knowing it had to be done. Had I stayed there I would surely have gone mad! My depression around this time was terrible, I felt I would barely get home without loosing my mind. I had obsessive thoughts on suicide often (though I'm better now, more later). For quite some time after my return I had no employment, this served to decrease my self-esteem even more, thus my obsession with suicide. I finally got a position with a security company, but this wasn't ideal. It kept me isolated, alone, and I felt my mind start to dive.

Around 5 months later I was just so sick mentally (from depression) that I had to goto the ER an get some help. I had no insurance so it sucked, but after being treated like trash I basically found I had a choice, go home or be admitted volunteerily to a psychiatric clinic. What did I do? I went. I spent Christmas there, basically trying not to want to die.

Enough of that though, I got on Zoloft, got Therapy (for a few years now) and found a job. The thing about it is I still have no social life, except what I've gotten online. I work, I talk with people, but seriously I've got no friends.

My questions to you all are really just to offer up your opinions. I'm fine now, Zoloft basically treats my problems with depression. Still not wanting to die hasn't helped me meet any friends or find something I feel comfortable in. I live at home, am 25, haven't had a girlfriend in years if ever. So what am I doing wrong? Considering my dealings with school going to college (I did go for awhile but didn't want to finish) seems crazy. I'm sure seeing everyone around me so smart, socially developed, well it would make me feel even worse then I do now about everything that's happened to me.

I'm trying to overcome my learned helplessness, so I figured why not find out what scientific people thought.

 

[Theoryofrelativity]

You need to take responsiblity for yourself and your life, you have no one to blame for your isolation other than yourself. It is no good saying you are a nice person when you are not making advances to either help others or interact with others. Why are they avoiding you? What negative signals do you emit?

Note this:

Negative attitude with regard to yourself is contagious. if you dislike yourself others will too.

Self love and self esteem is all important, if you feel great about yourself others will too.

Make a promise to yourself to make an effort with others and do not be afraid to give and to take.

There are some great books out there that can help you:

'How to win friends and influence people' by Dale Carnegie

and

'How to get anyone to do anything you want'

(google titles with amazon they will both pop up)

You need to take a leap of faith and force yourself into the social arena.

Also you need to lose your bad attitudes towards women, they are very unattractive and despite your attempts to disguise your feelings in this regard you exude loathing for women. Stemming from your perceived rejection by them, but they reject you because you expect them to. it is a self fullfilling prophecy.

Another great book:

'bring out the magic in your mind' Al koran

Change your life today and get those books, best money you ever spent.

NOTE: EPA found in omega 3 is great for depression, read about it here:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/0340824964/202-0547848-1731813?v=glance&n=266239

brain changing results seen on brain scans...NOT mumbo jumbo!



Do not ask others here to tell you what your life may be if you do not change JUST endeavour TO change. Change is in your control, take control and change.

 

[Satyr]

The amount of self-indulgent superficiality on this forum exposes a very important fact about it to me.

Its members are mostly adolescent males and females – having seen Muslim’s picture recently, which he so eloquently provided for us, I am also aware of the type of teenagers they are – or they are retarded adults stuck in some state of mental and psychological adolescence (with females this is a lifelong state as they are the human mind lingering in adolescence and which also refers us back to the ‘Feminization of Man’ which is producing males with similar deficiencies).
Most of the membership here is seeking friendship and a community environment to comfort them selves with and pretend they are thinking with superficial snip-its and emotional gossiping.

It is unavoidable that most consider philosophy as the pursuit of happiness - that is the thought that directly leads to contentment and self-satisfaction – when it is merely the pursuit of truth, which may or may not be used or be conducive to happiness.

The misconception that reality must automatically be ‘positive’ or ‘good’ is followed by the error that all exposition of what is perceived as ‘real’ must automatically be ready-made pleasant and comforting and that no effort is required to make it so.

This leads us back to the religious mind that sees the universe as a positive environment, dominated by a benevolent, caring, compassionate, loving entity they anthopomorphosize into a father figure and call God.
This adolescent mind-set is dismayed by the idea that reality must be made munificent and that there is no parental intervention there to save them from the effort and the uncertainty.

The universe isn’t forgiving or hospitable to life. If it were life would be ubiquitous and not striving to cling to a piece of temporal/spatial real-estate in the middle of nothingness, suffering and fighting and conceding to survive.
To believe that any exposure of ‘truth’, no matter how ephemeral or imprecise or partial it may be, concerning reality would be pleasant or ‘happy’ is truly a naïve, at best, belief.
The very fact that it is positively inclined towards our self-interest should make us all the more skeptical about it.

The reason for this mental retardation is due to, as usual, a sheltering from the worse life has to offer.
Just like a child never grows up if the parents pamper and protect and provide for it, indefinitely, so modern man is retained in a state of childishness through institutional pampering and sheltering. The herd, the group, becomes a wall between the individual and life’s many dangers and vulgarities and civilization is a human construct meant to protect and defend its participants from suffering or the natural circumstances of living.
This is often referred to as ‘dumbing-down’ and is the natural result of more complicated unites appropriating less complicated unities into their midst.

As with digestion, the consumed is broken down to its most simple elements so as to be absorbed into a new entity and the rest is discarded as feces.
In social unities the individual is broken down to his most simple state so that he can be more readily absorbed and used.
The rest is expelled as human feces when it is deemed unusable or it is vomited out with force when it is indigestible.

:bugeye:

 

[Roman]

The reason for this mental retardation is due to, as usual, a sheltering from the worse life has to offer.
Just like a child never grows up if the parents pamper and protect and provide for it, indefinitely, so modern man is retained in a state of childishness through institutional pampering and sheltering. The herd, the group, becomes a wall between the individual and life’s many dangers and vulgarities and civilization is a human construct meant to protect and defend its participants from suffering or the natural circumstances of living.
This is often referred to as ‘dumbing-down’ and is the natural result of more complicated unites appropriating less complicated unities into their midst.

I have an altogether different take.

Adaptation to environment. Most animals adapt through genetic change. The simpler creatures have the advantage of creating new generations faster, each a little better suited to the environment. More complex organisms, due to energy restraints, have slower reproductive rates, but individuals are allowed greater autonomy from instinct, thus may adapt behaviorally.

Humans are undoubtedly at the peak of behavioral evolution. But adapting behaviorally to the modern world means we must pass up traits and behaviors that would be better suited for more primitive times.

It's not that primitive humans or modern humans are superior to other, just as a Australian tree kangaroo isn't really superior or inferior to a South American peccary.

 

[Carcano]

Sder, Your going to have to find out what the roots (plural) of the problem are...and they seem to be both biochemical and pyschological.

On the biochemical side, there could be something in your diet that is causing this depressed mood, or it could be some vitamin/mineral which is lacking.

Maybe you should try a supplement called Sam-E...google it. Perscription drugs like Zoloft almost always have negative mental side effects.

My own suggestion is to see a kinesiologist. A good introduction to this field is a book called Power vs. Force by Dr. David R. Hawkins, who once ran the largest psychiatric clinic in New York in the fifties.

Don't just wait around...your going to have to work at the problem with great persistance, and it will take time.

 

[Prince_James]

Sdrenzi:

I see one overwhelming flaw in your life:

You wait for things to happen.

A slave is ever at the beck and call of his master. A master, on the other hand, initiates the slave's actions - commands it, in fact.

What is life to you? A slave? Or a master?

I would say the latter. You allow it to dictate what you do. You allow others to approach you. You allow them to demand whether or not you have a social life. You do not extend yourself, make yourself known, and make the relationships oneself. Few people make an effort to extend their hands to someone that does not make themselves present.

Moreover, why are you so desirous of company? Of friendship? Are you not satisfied with yourself? Do you not have worth alone and outside the company of others? Why place yourself on a scale where your worth is determined in relation to another thing?

Aside from the books TheoryOfRelativity gave to you, I would also ask for some of your interests, so I might suggest some books, both fiction and non-fiction, that I think might be good for you. But most of all, I think you must litterally break free of your very self-imposed slavery.

Whyever do you wish for bondage when you can have the freedom of a man in control of his own destiny? A titan's power is at one's command by the simple assertion of your own dominion, of your control.

Perplexity:

"A problem shared is a problem doubled."

Whereas it can indeed be a symptom of worthlessness to beg assistance, can it truly be construed as improper to seek aid in the resolution of one's problems? That to share a problem in honest seeking of assistance as an urge to go about things, can hardly be seen as slavish, and indeed, what you suggest, the "shut up so I don't bother people", can often lead to wallowing in inferiority.

 

[heliocentric]

I think its a catch 22 situation - find it difficult to be in social settings therefore avoid social settings altogether, which only really makes the problem worse.
A situation im all to familiar with.
Id say the best thing to do is to through yourself in social situations as much as possible, i think being sociable is like anything else, you practice and practice and you get better at it.
Its the same as if i practiced football everyday, im not a naturally skilled athlete and realistically probably wouldnt be as good as a Ronaldo or whoever, but i could get good enough to know my way round the field and play a decent game.
*horribly cheesy analogy but you get what i mean...
Being sociable if youre not naturally inclinded towards it is a never ending learning experience (for me anyway) im constantly suprised at the different levels i can speak to people on and how interaction varies between race,gender,nationality, and age.
And i find you can always suprise yourself in social situations where you thought youd crumble but you actually find yourself commanding the conversation.
So yeah just throw yourself into new social situations as much as possible, and be bloody minded about it, you *are* going to make new connections no matter what

 

[Prince_James]

Perplexity:

Whether or not message boards or the people who frequent them are a fruitful venue for the airing of personal woes for comfort or advice, is not at all to be found in your original posting. Quoting a slavish platitude as mock-advice in a manner which betrays a sense of schaedenfreude when met with these people.

I assert that you take pleasure in simply being whimsically misanthropic. And, perhaps out of shame, you attempt to hide this with a rationalization from a Buddhist scripture. Top this with a nihilist cherry of bemoaning how few people grasp themselves, and well, there you go.

Consider construction instead of destruction. Let us build instead of tear down, shall we?

Come now, you are capable of such things, I hope?

 

[Oniw17]

It's not that primitive humans or modern humans are superior to other, just as a Australian tree kangaroo isn't really superior or inferior to a South American peccary.

I think he was talking mainly about the effects that our "watered down" society has on us, rather than our superiority/inferiority to primal man. Maybe not though.

 

[Satyr]

I think he was talking mainly about the effects that our "watered down" society has on us, rather than our superiority/inferiority to primal man. Maybe not though.

BINGO!!!
Hey look!
Someone who can read and who doesn’t think using his ass.

When we capture and raise animals that were once wild and free, the astonishing thing occurs.
They can no longer survive without our help.
Why?

They’ve become dependant, domesticated, friendly, and tolerant.

See man domesticating himself all around you.

Like all domestication it results in a passive, dull, dependant, tolerating, and adolescent dispositions.
In such controlled, shielded environments what difference between male and female (gender loses its natural role) or between superior and inferior (value is dictated through institutions)?
Things become uniform and level.

The male loses its primary function and becomes a sperm dispenser with feminine attributes, or is castrated so that he never develops into a full male.

They say dogs are wolves that have remained in the adolescent stage.
We like them, we enjoy them. Their friendly, loyal submission to us makes them attractive and comforting to us but we have little respect for them as creatures.

This goes back to a general loss of respect in human sheltering environments. The loss of respect for self and for the world and for nature is directly linked to this process.
Why?
Because respect, even self-respect, is a product of fear.
No fear, no respect.
Why do children not respect their elders, in our time?
Because the system protects them and has offered them a false sense of security and entitlement.
They believe they have a right to life where in the past it was earned.
They believe they are deserving just by being born. All life becomes holy with unquestionable rights.
They have been shielded from the consequences of their actions and so they act unthinking.

A man that has never been punched in the face can never know respect and discipline and true, not fake, humility, and self-control. He will take his lack of pain as invulnerability and think highly of himself when it is the system that guarantees his existence.
Get it yet, children?

Fear, in our pseudo-altruistic, western domesticated environments, has acquired a negative connotation - indiscriminate love and compassion being the only desired and acceptable emotions in an overpopulated world.
This makes Christianity (and most religions) and Democracy (and communism) a product of necessity not moral superiority. These memes could have only flourished in a world with growing populations, shrinking spaces and diminishing resources.
When civilization required workers to maintain its structures the ideals of tolerance and love and compassion and rights for all became essential for a harmonious co-existence.
The herd psychology was born.

Another opinion that will raise the ire and the eyebrows of girly-men and feminine romantics.

Fear, in fact, is a survival necessity that keeps the mind alert and engaged in the world and productive and striving and creative and growing.
Like anything else it becomes destructive when it overwhelms the mind.

Take away fear and you create dim-wits and dull minds (Dumbing-Down).


Haven’t you people heard?!!!
Greece beat the U.S. in basketball!!!!
Greek men can jump!

 

[Prince_James]

Perplexity:

Considering you are wont to fling quotes from past conversations out of no where into current conversations - I have witnessed you doing so at least once before - I would have you give the conversation from whence you took this quote?

"sderenzi gets what comes to him."

This strongly depends on the context.

"Constructive suggestion: Allow me to know myself, to grasp myself, so to speak, and to express myself, instead of presuming to mean for me, to grasp me, so to speak, as if to know more about me than I do.

I am old enough to discriminate between smarmy shit and insight."

If we are to indeed assume that you're correct in stating that:

"Our experiences vary too much, so you are lucky if they've begun to understand their own, let alone any hope to second guess what yours are about."

Then at the very least, you have not a leg to stand on if you aren't presumed to understand yourself very well at all, and though you caution us not to attempt to deal with others, either, I would at least point out that some people may indeed "know what it is up", as it were.

 

[Theoryofrelativity]

Please tell. Who punched you in the face?

Or in view of your remarkable lack of humility, is this yet to be anticipated?

--- Ron.

being punched in the face rather gives you a taste for punching someone else in the face

not sure how that relates to humility?

 

[thedevilsreject]

you have to make friendships, if you are to shy to approach anyone people will think you are not interested and will not attempt to make friends with you

 

[c7ityi_]

You're valuable even if you have no friends.

 

[thedevilsreject]

to be honest you sound rather lazy to me, you dont want to work to make friends or meet girlfriends, you need to work at most things for them to happen

 

[c7ityi_]

to be honest you sound rather lazy to me, you dont want to work to make friends or meet girlfriends, you need to work at most things for them to happen

No, everything we have is given from above.

 

[Theoryofrelativity]

I wrote something similar elsewhere:

Instead of pretending I prefer to to seek formidable opponents,
to be humiliated;
defeats teach more than empty affectations,
and with enough of them suffered the sense of humility comes naturally enough.

Likewise with appreciation,
when the support and assistance is of some real use,
the rest of it is not so problematic.

--- Ron.

humility is overated

 

[FallingSkyward]

BINGO!!!
This goes back to a general loss of respect in human sheltering environments. The loss of respect for self and for the world and for nature is directly linked to this process.
Why?
Because respect, even self-respect, is a product of fear.
No fear, no respect.
Why do children not respect their elders, in our time?

Previously we may have respected our elders too much, allowing them to dictate how our lives were to be run. We now have a much more individualistic society - the current generation is very "me" centered - which creates a vast array of people trying to find their own way of living.

Authority is often seen as less of something to fear, so now people can voice their opinions! They are free to develop in unique ways. Previously, we were confined by our fear. "I will not be different, I am afraid of offending the family and offending society." No longer. "Different" is praised. "Thinking for yourself" is now the one attribute parents wish for their children above all others. Paving your own way, a new way, is seen as an honorable endeavor.

The revolution that has brought forth this lack of fear is a liberating one. We are no longer afraid to have and voice our opinions, to be unique.

And variety of thought propels us onward.

They believe they are deserving just by being born. All life becomes holy with unquestionable rights.

This isn't exactly a recent development.

Fear, in fact, is a survival necessity that keeps the mind alert and engaged in the world and productive and striving and creative and growing.
Like anything else it becomes destructive when it overwhelms the mind.

You've outlined that we need fear. But fear of what, exactly? What exactly did people fear before that made them so much more productive? And what did they produce as a result of this fear?

Fear is an limitating emotion, not a productive one. Granted, as you've stated previously, some limitations resulting from fear such as self-control and discipline are conductive to production, but these terms are synonymous with holding back. These chains are the purpose of fear. Because of this, fear limits. Fear quiets. Fear keeps you hidden in your hole.

It is the emotion that keeps us alive, enacted to keep us a step ahead of pain, death, or humilation. Because of this it can't be seen as a productive process, but one that defers production. When we're afraid, we avoid the situation as a defense mechanism. We don't produce. My point is made beautifully by the poster's lack of social life.

 

[Carcano]

The revolution that has brought forth this lack of fear is a liberating one. We are no longer afraid to have and voice our opinions, to be unique.

In and of itself, just being 'unique' is not necessarily positive.

 

[Satyr]

FallingSkyward

Previously we may have respected our elders too much, allowing them to dictate how our lives were to be run. We now have a much more individualistic society - the current generation is very "me" centered - which creates a vast array of people trying to find their own way of living.

We are always “me centered” (selfish), we just find different avenues towards this 'me' and different ways of defining the 'me'.

Authority is often seen as less of something to fear, so now people can voice their opinions! They are free to develop in unique ways. Previously, we were confined by our fear. "I will not be different, I am afraid of offending the family and offending society." No longer. "Different" is praised. "Thinking for yourself" is now the one attribute parents wish for their children above all others. Paving your own way, a new way, is seen as an honorable endeavor.

The revolution that has brought forth this lack of fear is a liberating one. We are no longer afraid to have and voice our opinions, to be unique.

And variety of thought propels us onward.

I never said we should be “confined” by our fear.
Courage is measured by how one copes or overcomes fear, not by its absence.
An absence of fear is usually a sign of ignorance and/or naivite, not of courage.
We often mistake ignorance for courage.

My position is mostly in relation to remaining respectful towards the unknown and responsible for one's self.

When one is shielded from the consequences of his own actions, he acts foolishly, and recklessly. He begins believing that he is more or other than what he is. A female, for example, believes she is like a male and a boy like a man. There is no cost to their error. It is defended by institutions.
When one is protected from accountability one becomes disrespectful and foolish.

To challenge authority is the duty of every thinking mind. To be protected from the consequences of this challenging is to make it inconsequential and absurd.

Society might be built around the myth of it being for “individuality” - Orwell described a system by which meanings could be turned around or warped, and so excluded from possibility or turned into their opposite (watch in the US how the media has been called 'liberal') - but the reality is that any unity can only tolerate a certain amount of ‘individuality’ and distinction.
What is often referred to as ‘free-thinking’ still remains within socially acceptable parameters of thought and expression.

Attitude, style, expression, thought, opinion is restricted - civility and politeness is such a restriction.

This very Forum offers ample evidence of how censoring is enforced and how human groups exclude unwanted thinking.
Threats of police, threats of isolation and exclusion, attacks against personality, endless feminine suppositions about one’s penis, or sexual life or experience, are all used to minimize divergence from an acceptable norm.

Most, in this western setting, exhibit their social and cultural indoctrination by excluding racist, sexist, or violent expressions of opinion.
They take these terms as inherently ‘evil’ without ever having to prove it or define what ‘evil’ is or why they are so.
Just the mention of these words is enough and they have an entire system behind them, supporting their prejudice.

This is a form of communal censoring.
Another is shame.

The smaller the group the more tolerating of individual quirks it is.
This is because individuals matter more to the group and each individual’s distinct talents and contributions are more valuable to the whole.
The larger the group the less tolerating of diversion from established morality or law it is.
This is because the individual is expendable and replaceable. All that is required of him is to fit in and do what he’s supposed to. (duty)

This is how ‘dumbing-down’ works or how the common average denominator lowers:
First individuals are protected from their own weakness and the ravages and cleansing mechanisms of nature.
{In nature stupidity, error, and feebleness – mental or otherwise – is punished with death}
These individuals are given rights and offered the indisputable human right to dignity or life or procreation.
This, automatically, increases the population lending itself to the needs of a civilization with resource and institutional needs.
The increase is due to the procreation of weakness.

Order is first maintained by force and then a more sophisticated form of control, using a combination of indoctrination/domestication/feminization is used to breed docility and discipline to authority. The masses are convinced they are free when they are not and that ‘war is peace’ or whatever.

This human intervention in natural methods, just as any human intervention, results in unforeseeable repercussions.
Pollution, for example, not only of the environment but of the human gene pool, is one.
Weakness and disease is replicated and flourishes, defended by communal force. Quantity over Quality.

This, in turn, lowers the average intelligence, as weakness tries to justify its own existence.

Today even those pretending to be "different" are really full-participants in the conformity. A punk-rocker or an anarchist stops at the red light and obeys common laws.
Conformity is institutionally enforced and individuality is confined to specific, acceptable expressions, such as dress or music or symbolism.
Rebelliousness is superficial or it turns into blatant parasitism.

Fear towards the communal norm is reinforced and respect maintained.
Fear towards everything else is lowered.

This isn't exactly a recent development.

In recent times it has become entrenched as a ‘right’.
As if love and compassion and freedom and respect and dignity are things all deserve rather than things one should earn and fight for and evolve into.
We are born with privilege, as a rich man’s pampered son, and we don’t have to work for it.
We then become falsely arrogant, and demanding, and spoiled, and naïve and careless and extravagant, and disrespectful.

You've outlined that we need fear. But fear of what, exactly? What exactly did people fear before that made them so much more productive? And what did they produce as a result of this fear?

They feared the consequences of their own actions.
They were held accountable, immediately and severly.
A lion, despite its physical power, still only goes for the easiest kill.
It is careful and in so being it exhibits a respect for its prey.

In nature an act either pays-off or it does not. The creature is immediately held accountable for its decisions.

In human environments we’ve constructed safety-nets and excuses and institutional shields which blunt the consequences and protects us from ourselves.
There is no severity to action, except for a select few actions which become social anathemas and are severly punished.
This results in carelessness and irresponsibility.

I can pee all over another’s car and only risk a lawsuit or a reprimand.
The law stands before me and the consequences of my actions.
The other can only get back at me through the law or else face the consequences himself.

But all progress is based on the Need to overcome.
I act so as to alleviate a weakness or a lack.
We invent and investigate so as to overcome our vulnerabilities.
Man explores because he fears the unknown; because he is vulnerable to it.

Fear is an limitating emotion, not a productive one. Granted, as you've stated previously, some limitations resulting from fear such as self-control and discipline are conductive to production, but these terms are synonymous with holding back. These chains are the purpose of fear. Because of this, fear limits. Fear quiets. Fear keeps you hidden in your hole.

Fear limits, as with anything else, when fear dominates; when it controls.
When it is controlled it is but a motive. Emotion is a fire. It can burn you if it is allowed to reign free.
But harness the fire and you get technology or warmth or whatever. It then becomes a tool.


Fear forces efficiency and care in acting. It forces forethought and focus. It forces creativity.

It is the emotion that keeps us alive, enacted to keep us a step ahead of pain, death, or humilation. Because of this it can't be seen as a productive process, but one that defers production. When we're afraid, we avoid the situation as a defense mechanism. We don't produce. My point is made beautifully by the poster's lack of social life.

Again.
You are assuming that fear is dominating over reason, as it often does with emotional minds.
I have no doubt that this is often the case with the majority.

It is anxiety and fear that keeps man producing and seeking and asking.
If this anxiety dominates the mind sees emotionally and falls into religious dogma or falls for feel-good, ready-made answers such as the holiness of Love or selflessness or equality or the sanctity of life and so on…..

A truly courageous mind is not one that feels no fear or anxiety, it is the one that overcomes it, that acts despite of it, that seeks without predetermining what it wants to find, and that looks upon the world honestly and gathers information to use.
This information can be used for self-interests and alleviating fear or sometimes it can only be coped with.

Information (the universe) is indifferent to our needs and desires.
If we consistency see it as positively inclined towards us then we are truly naïve.
We make things positive for us; we shape them and force them. They do not come ready-made for us to bask under their warming light.

Where before humans had to work all day in the fields for our food, we now must work all day doing more complex jobs. Our sustenence is not being handed to us. Because of this, our societal development cannot be compared to the domestication of wolves.

I believe you focus more on the benefits and neglect the costs.
I would agree with the advantages of communal living but I wonder how aware you are of the costs.
To have your belly full is certainly a pleasant and desirable thing - we are creature of need – but our reason should not be overly concerned with our human frailties or directed by need.

One cost of having your biological needs met is a loss of freedom. For some this tradeoff is worth it, for others it might not be.

For some there are far more important things than survival.
Dignity for one.
Freedom.
Self-respect.

Would you trade your dignity for a full belly?